


Frostbite

by Graymuse42



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Amnesia, Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, Cisco Ramon Whump, Cisco Ramon-centric, Gen, How Do I Tag, Hurt/Comfort, Kidnapping, Minor Character Death, Temporary Character Death, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-11
Updated: 2018-12-02
Packaged: 2019-05-20 19:56:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 20
Words: 23,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14900972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Graymuse42/pseuds/Graymuse42
Summary: And now the voice in his head was making promises to him. Charming. Would that voice follow him wherever he went? Would he go anywhere? Or would he just float around like some disembodied conscious for the rest of time. Would he be a ghost?He looked up at a strange noise, and could have sworn he was hallucinating. The pile of snow that had formed in front of the door was…melting. Okay, he was dead and being drawn to some kind of slippery afterlife.There was a figure in a parka standing in the doorway. “What’s a slippery afterlife and what does it have to do with anything? I told you, you’re not dying!”Cisco just stared at the man, and his last thoughts as the cold claimed him were: why is the parka angel being rude? I just died.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, I don't know what I'm doing! Thank you so much for reading this, I've got several ways this story could go! This is unbetad, (is that how it's spelled?) so if you see any mistakes just let me know! Also, if you have questions. I'll try to answer them in coming chapters. Some questions are intentional, some are just: I'm forgetful.

Frozen.

He was a creature of ice, surrounded by the very thing which stole his breath and threatened to end him. Cisco shivered, his jacket made even less effective by the t-shirt underneath. The jeans he’d worn for mid April utterly ineffective against the freezing temperatures of the mountain he’d been trapped on. The worst part was: he didn’t remember how he’d gotten there.

He didn’t even know if it was April anymore. Given the layers of dirt and sweat clinging to his shirt, he doubted it.

Where was he? How did he get there? And what day was it? Cisco had woken up on the cliff of a mountain, surrounded by snow, with the sun just beginning to peek through, with no civilization in sight. No memory of how he’d gotten there. He’d gone searching for a way down, or some kind of shelter. What he’d found was a cave, but as he examined it the mouth of the cave had collapsed behind him, sealing him inside the icy prison to freeze to death.

He guessed it had been an hour or so since he’d gotten trapped. He could no longer see his breath in front of him, but he figured it was more due to his own body dropping its temperature too far than of the temperature around him getting warmer. He closed his eyes, shivering, and let his head drop to his knees. So this is where he ended. Surrounded by ice, forgotten by the world. Fitting, given what he’d done. Not a lot of people would care about another dead body from the particle accelerator. Especially the body of someone who built it.

Caitlin though…where was Caitlin? Was she okay? How was she holding up without him? After everything that had happened with Ronnie, she had to be dying inside having lost both of them now. And what about Barry? Cisco shuddered as he remembered the young man. He’d been through so much. Cisco had been looking forward to talking to him when he woke up. Now he didn’t think he’d get that chance.

And Doctor Wells, Cisco had been thinking of working on an implant to help him walk again. While Cisco could believe that Harrison Wells was smart enough to figure out the implant himself, it would probably take years longer without Cisco there to help him. It was only now that Cisco realized he was likely dying, and he hadn’t thought of his family once. Would they even miss him?

_You’re not dying kid, you can’t be._

Ah yes. Then there was that voice. That one, pesky voice that had popped into his head five months back. Probably a sign of psychosis. Hearing voices in his head. Maybe it was guilt? He would die before curing himself of it all. Nothing to be done for it. Another shiver racked his frame, and he lay down fully. So this is how he died. Frozen on some random mountain, completely alone. Maybe this was his curse for building the particle accelerator. To die frozen on a cliff face where no one would ever find his body.

_Kid, don’t give up, we’re coming!_

And that annoying voice in his head. That too. Was it sick and twisted of him to find comfort in the voice in his head?

_Voice in your head? Kid you’re delirious! Just stay awake, alright? We’ll be there in a few minute, I promise! Just stay awake!_

And now the voice in his head was making promises to him. Charming. Would that voice follow him wherever he went? Would he go anywhere? Or would he just float around like some disembodied conscious for the rest of time. Would he be a ghost? He looked up at a strange noise, and could have sworn he was hallucinating. The pile of snow that had formed in front of the door was…melting. Okay, he was dead and being drawn to some kind of slippery afterlife.

There was a figure in a parka standing in the doorway. “What’s a slippery afterlife and what does it have to do with anything? I told you, you’re not dying!” Cisco just stared at the man, and his last thoughts as the cold claimed him were _why is the parka angel being rude? I just died._


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cisco wakes up to a world he isn't prepared for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I'm going to have a lot of flashbacks and such through the course of the story. I'm kind of adding tags as I go? Let me know if I need to add another one. So, I'm gonna try to drop context clues as to when each flashback is in the scene, and try to keep it all in order. Try being the operative word. Let me know what you think! Thank you so much for the kudos!

Hushed voices were talking around him. He was lying somewhere flat, soft, and warm. A bed, he figured. But given the massive warmth surrounding him he figured whoever had brought him here was making sure he didn’t freeze to death. He thought he heard a fire crackling nearby, and…were the blankets heated? He wasn’t sure of much else, except he could hear that voice in his head talking again. Only…it wasn’t talking to him. It was one of the hushed voices, and it was talking to another voice. He didn’t recognize this one.

The voice was gruff and blunt, like the person behind the voice couldn’t care less about anything but his muscles. “The kid’s gotta go back. You know how long they’ve been looking for ‘im.”

The voice from his head spoke up again. “Mick, that’s the problem. They’re not the only ones. People are looking for him. Right now he’s safe with us. If we send him back, there’s no telling what’ll happen to him. Here, we can protect him. Figure out what happened. Then once we know how they got him last time we can stop it from happening again.”

“But his team will be able to help with that-”

The voice from his head cut off the other man. “His team is the reason he’s in this mess to begin with!”

“Listen, I get that you had your falling out, but-”

Cisco opened his eyes then, and both of the voices stopped abruptly. He stared at them, and the two men stepped away from each other. The one in the blue parka leaned against the doorframe, and the one in…(were those suspenders?) took up residence near the fireplace.

The man in the parka continued to stare at him, till Cisco finally spoke. “Thank you for saving my life…?”

“You’re welcome, as always.” That voice was smooth and soft. Before it had been intense and low, but now it seemed…friendly. Gentle. Cisco found himself trusting it immediately. It helped that it was close to the voice in his head. But…how could that be? Before Cisco got a chance to ask, the man was talking again. “Things have been rather tense since your disappearance. We’re doing all we can to make sure this never happens again. But for that we need your help. Do you know how you ended up on that mountain?” Cisco shook his head. “Do you know who had you last?”

Cisco stared at him. “Who…had me?” he propped himself up on his elbows and glanced around the room. It was large, with a roaring fire a few feet away keeping the whole room warm. He was on a large bed, in what seemed to be a cabin. The trees were red and orange outside. It was fall then…what had happened to him??

The man moved to sit next to Cisco on the bed. “I’m trying to be gentle here, because I know this is a tough subject for you. But I need you to focus: What’s the last thing you can remember?”

He thought about it. He’d been going to get coffee, and had just received a text from Doctor Wells. Cisco glanced towards the window again. This…wasn’t good. “…April?”

The man took a deep breath. “That’s a lot of missing time. It’s alright though, we’ll figure this out, alright?”

The man clasped Cisco’s shoulder. Cisco stared at the hand. “…I hope this isn’t a stupid question, but who are you again?” The man froze, and Cisco noticed the other man, Mick, staring at him. “…Starting to seem like a stupid question.”

“What do you remember, kid?” Mick asked.

“Um…I remember going to get coffee in April, and I remember getting a text from my boss, I remember…I remember I was looking for a friend,” Cisco wasn’t sure if he could trust these people with details. He hoped he could, but he didn’t want to risk it if they couldn’t be trusted.

Next to him, the man in the parka stiffened. “Wells. You received a text from Wells?” The man’s voice remained the same, but Cisco could tell there was anger there. He didn’t know from what though. Everything external said the man was still as calm as he had been a moment earlier.

“Who are you again?” The man took a deep breath before replying. “My name’s Leonard, we’re friends. Remember?” Cisco shook his head. This was bad. “Cisco, what year is it?”

He didn’t even need to think. “It’s 2014,” then he paused. “…is it not 2014?”

Leonard glanced across to Mick. “Cisco it’s October of 2015. We…we hadn’t met in April of last year. You went missing April of this year.”

Cisco stared between them. “…huh?” (

 

Flashback)

Snart had been curious about it all, especially now that he knew the metahumans had come from the particle accelerator. Because he’d been effected that night as well. He’d thought it was some form of guilt or anger at what had happened to Sam, but he couldn’t reconcile that with who he was. Still, he couldn’t deny that a voice had shown up in his head that night. It was a strange voice, full of musings and ramblings about science and tv shows. So a geek.

But whoever it was had clearly had something to do with the explosion. Snart couldn’t hear this, but guilt was wracking through him at random times, which could only be from whoever his mind had connected him to.

It irked him.

He found himself at a coffee shop, with pen in his hand and paper in front of him, listening to this voice ramble on about firemen. Mick would find the conversation hilarious. For someone who prided himself on planning every detail, having a voice in his head other than his own was worrying. Even more worrying was the fact that if he could hear this person’s voice, there was nothing stopping that other person from hearing his voice. Which meant he could hear Snart’s plans.

Which was why he was here, sitting in a coffee shop, pretending to be writing. That’s what people did in coffee shops, right? They wrote? So he sat and he wrote. Everything the voice was saying.

_So what’s the exact temperature that a fire burns at?_

_Do we need to create some kind of gas mask?_

_What if they get rid of Clara by killing her off?_

_No, wait, it’s a new doctor, they wouldn’t do that. Well, maybe they would._

_Battle of the 5 armies was way too drawn out._

_How do I make someone invincible?_

_Something to replicate dragon scales?_

_That would be cool. Or like Smaug. Maybe not so cool._

Snart groaned, rubbing his head. He’d been listening for 30 minutes, and that was all he could make out. The voice changed every few minutes, and he couldn’t make out what his…mental handicap, was thinking about. If anything though that meant the voice at the other side of the connection couldn’t read his thoughts that easily either.

He looked up as the waitress started talking to one of the regulars. He seemed ordinary, but Snart had seen him around. That was Joe West, a cop. Snart closed his notebook and made his way out of the coffee shop before he was spotted. He’d need to remember that in future dates. Maybe that would be useful. When he came back into town.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Takes place around the 1x10 episode 'Revenge of the Rogues'.

(flashback)

Cisco was getting irritated with the voice. Who he was definitely not calling Harvey. Harvey (alright, he was calling him Harvey) was feeling victorious right now. How something as complicated as victory was getting through, Cisco wasn't sure.

When the voice had first shown up, after the accelerator, Cisco had felt a surge of emotions that he could barely decipher. Every once in a while he would even hear words, though there was no distinct voice. Usually the voice was actually somewhat...gangster? Usually movie quotes from the Godfather and such. But after a month or so the emotions had dulled. The words came every week or so, if that, instead of several times a day. He wondered what had happened to Harvey. 

But here the emotions and words were again. Words, still uncommon, but a few times a day at least. And right now Harvey was feeling victorious. And Cisco was pissed. What did he do, win the lottery? Well either way, he could do without the spare emotions. Caitlin's life was in danger, he needed to focus. 

He was entering a warehouse with Joe, hoping that they were right and that they weren't about to walk into a trap. Leave it to Cold to kill them for trying to save their friend. He heard a voice, and started moving towards it, heart pounding. 

The next few moments happened in a blur. Cisco spotted Caitlin, ran towards her, tripped a wire, and Joe yanked him back while knocking over Caitlin's chair just in time to save her from the bomb beneath her chair. Cisco swore his heart stopped for a moment, before he ran forwards to help her up. She was safe. 

Cold had nearly killed his friend. 

But Caitlin was safe. 

 

 

There was an unsettling amount of anxiety in his connection. To Cold it made sense. If his voice really did live in Central like he suspected, then odds were his voice was watching this. More than that, his voice was probably a fan of the Flash. Best not to kill the hero then. Just catch his attention. 

Cold had left Central for a few months to discover his connection weaker. When he returned for the diamond heist, it was stronger than he'd remembered. Months of scarce emotions to be hit with a surge of spare thoughts was dizzying, but had confirmed Cold's theory. His voice was a resident of his home city. Doubtless also effected by the Particle Accelerator. Which made all of this so much more fun. It was all just a show he was putting on, catching the attention of any audience willing to listen. 

And it was all going according to plan. The Flash was clearly trying to get him and Rory to cross streams, and cause some kind of unknown reaction within their guns. Most likely the two forces would prove to be true opposites and would cancel each other out, giving the Flash time to arrest them. That wasn't the plan though. Not plan A at least. 

But then Cold felt his shoulder being shoved, and his stomach drop suddenly. He stopped and looked around himself, but nothing was happening to him. The Flash was currently running up a building, (he could do that?) and the police were staying their safe distance away from the fight. Which meant something must have happened to his voice. 

This was confirmed by a wave of affection that washed over him, and Cold was about to mutter about stupid family drama when a word came through. 

_Caitlin,_

He glanced across to Mick. That couldn't be coincidence, could it? His voice...it couldn't be... If only there were a way to be sure. 

He nodded at Mick, and Mick knew what to do. Plan B. They were gonna let the Flash catch them. 

 

Through the next 24 hours, during being arrested, and processed, and then later when Lisa broke them out he could only think about one thing. 

His voice. 

His voice was on team Flash? He needed access to the footage from that warehouse. 

As soon as they got to the established safe house Cold pulled up footage from the camera he'd installed. Sure enough, two people had managed to save the Doctor from that blast. An older man, that he recognized as the cop from the coffee shop. Joe West. Cold could rule him out as a voice, seeing as there was no way the detective would be making that many science jokes through his day. But the other one...

Cold zoomed in. The kid was the one who had tripped the wire, and the detective had shoved his shoulder to get him out of the way of the blast. He'd ran forward and hugged her as soon as he'd stood up. He was also the one who'd tried to bluff him with a vacuum outside the wreckage of the train to save the Flash, right as his voice had started freaking out that night. Still, how to know?

_Once is a chance, Twice is a coincidence,_

He googled the kid, identifying him as a 'Cisco Ramon', of Star Labs. He had a brother who was going to be having a birthday in the next few months. Plenty of time to plan, and make sure things were in place. 

_Three time's a pattern._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay! So I'm not sure if I want to do more Flashbacks or more Normal Timeline next, so stay with me! I try to update at least once every other day, but work sometimes gets a little crazy, so. Thank you for reading this!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Takes place over the course of 1x15 and 1x16

There was one day left. Snart had his whole plan in place, with backup plans to match. It was exhilarating to make a plan with such a vital variable in the mix. Everything hinged on if his theory was proved correct. He'd prefer to not have to kill his other voice, especially if it proved to be Cisco. The kid was smart, and Snart had grown used to the random jokes popping up in his head, and had grown...dare he say attached? 

It had been too long of a night. 

He closed his laptop, going to stand up when dread crept up his spine. His voice had been on edge all day, and Cold tried to temper that with his thrill of a new exploit. But this...

His vision began to swim as his pulse lost control, bringing him to his knees. He gasped for air against the anxiety from his connection as the voice in his head began to panic 

_no no no, this can't be happening, no this can't be, Joe was right, this can't happen, nonononononono_

He abandoned his plan, focusing his thoughts through the connection. 

_Cisco, what's wrong? Talk to me, what's happening?!_

Cold was struck with pure fear as words began flowing unbridled through the connection. 

_It can't be him. It is him. But it can't be, but it is! He betrayed us, he betrayed the team. He's a murderer._

That enough had Cold on edge, but then one more thought came through. 

_He's going to kill me._

There were no accents or characters this time. Len knew that it was Cisco, could hear the kid's voice echo in his own head as if he were there in the room. He sounded broken. Len bolted from where he had collapsed on the floor, reaching for the cold gun right as a tear slipped from his eye as he began shaking. He wiped the tear away, knowing he wasn't the one who had shed it. Cisco's heart was breaking. Violently. 

He grabbed the cold gun, turning towards the door right as a sharp pain ripped through his chest and he screamed. 

He screamed himself awake, shooting up in his bed. It...was a dream? 

Already the details were fading, as if it had never happened. Cold grabbed a pen and paper from his nightstand, writing down what he could remember. 

-Cisco was the voice

-Cisco was in danger

-For some reason I tried to save him

-Cisco died

-I think I died too

Even those details were fading now. All Cold had were the notes on the paper in front of him. It had felt so real though...and now, he could barely remember anything. All he remembered was the clouds. He remembered an overcast sky. He glanced outside. It wasn't overcast. It was actually incredibly sunny. Perfect day for a kidnapping. 

He'd planned this out for several months, making sure everything lined up perfectly. It was risky, sure. But without risk, where was the fun? 

The plan was simple. Kidnap Cisco's brother, and have Lisa lure Cisco away from the Flash's aid. Then insist upon Cisco rebuilding the guns, while testing the connection to see if Cisco was really the voice in his head. Either way, Cold would release Cisco and his brother as soon as the guns were built. The only difficulty was in keeping his own mind stable, and not tripping the whole plan through the connection. 

The real problem was if Cisco realized who he was. If Cisco realized that he had Cold's voice in his head, then Cold would have no other choice. Team Flash would have an inside ear into his plans. And that couldn't be allowed to happen. If it came down to it, Cold liked his freedom from prison a lot more than he liked having a funny voice in his head. 

He paused, as he was reviewing his plan, his notes from that morning staring him in the face. 

_I tried to save him_

Confusion echoed back through his connection and Cold quickly stopped letting his mind wander. If the voice caught on to what was happening, then his plans were ruined. A dream proved nothing. He'd probably psyched himself up because of the day, and had let the dreams be influenced. A conscience was the last thing he needed right now. 

He walked over to where he'd dropped his cold gun. He went to pick it up, only for his heart rate to increase. The dream flashed before his eyes for a moment, of reaching for the gun in terror. It was gone again, and Cold shook the image from his head, to find that his pulse was still erratic. The connection was flaring, and Cold wondered. Wondered if had been a dream. 

Then his rational side kicked in and reminded him that he had better things to do than become randomly superstitious. 

 

The plan was flowing beautifully. Cold smirked as he held the gun in his hand, and he felt the pure anxiety coursing through the connection. Mick was to the side, examining his own weapon, and Lisa off in her room pouting about not having one. 

"Not the point, Lisa," He had muttered in her ear when she'd asked. 

Cisco was standing near the table on one side of the room, and his brother tied to a chair opposite him. Cold moved to stand in front of Cisco, between him and his brother. 

"I took this gun apart a hundred times; learned how it ticked, what went where," The heart on the other side of the connection dropped, and Cold had his answer. It was Cisco alright. Cisco moved to adjust the firing pin, and Cold smirked. 

 _smug bastard,_ came across the connection and Cold figured he deserved that one. Even if Cisco didn't know who he was talking to. 

He planned his next words carefully. One wrong move and Cisco would know. That would be problematic. He'd come to like the voice in his head, and he didn't particularly feel like killing him. But he couldn't have a mole in his own head, no matter how nice the mole was. 

He lost himself in thought for once second too long, barely side stepping the chair leg that Dante swung at him with his back turned. While he was able to avoid being knocked out by it, the leg still managed to hit his head with considerable force. Mick tackled Dante in an instant, but the damage was done. Snart held his head in one hand as he glanced towards Cisco, who had dropped to his knees, clutching his own head in one hand, other hand bracing himself against the floor. 

Shoot. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ....Yeah, that happened. And yes, that's gonna get a lot more complicated. I think I'm gonna try to get back to normal time soon, but for the moment you're stuck with my crazy head showing random flashbacks. And yes, I'm gonna be picking up where that left off ;)


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Len and Mick debate what to do

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey look! This isn't a flashback!   
> Alright, so I'm still figuring out a ton of things, but this should hopefully lead to some clues about...well, you'll see :)

There is nothing worse than knowing that someone you care about is in danger. That terrible feeling, sinking in your gut as you wait for your heart to break, knowing that you can do nothing to help them. For 6 months Len had waited, not knowing when his heart would stop beating as Cisco died. And now he was here… hypothermic, yes, but that was nothing the electric blanket and fireplace couldn’t handle. And other than that, he was fine. Well, physically fine, as far as they could tell. His mind though…

Amnesia. How could that be? Len’s connection with him had been torn apart almost entirely, whoever had taken Cisco had dragged him so far away that nothing but sensation and the briefest of emotions could get through. And for months Len had woken up screaming, phantom traces of whatever torture Cisco was being put through still echoing across his skin as he could do nothing. But then just the day before the connection had started to grow again. Emotions breaking through, providing a confusing but steady stream of information. The second Len could hear any words come through he set the satellite to scan for trace meta-human DNA outside the city limits. And sure enough, it registered in a mountain-range North of the city.

He’d broken every speed limit to get there, the words flowing stronger but still confusing. There was…guilt? And he was thinking about Ronnie? And something about ghosts? His calm had only lasted till they managed to melt the snow which had caved in the cavern in which Cisco was trapped. He saw Cisco pass out from the cold and he dove, barely catching his head before it hit the floor. “It’s not like he’s gonna get colder, boss,” Mick had so casually pointed out. Len had simply glared.

And now here they were, in a cabin halfway down the mountain which had thankfully been stocked with supplies to last out the blizzard that had gotten worse once they had arrived. The cabin was mostly studio in style, but had thankfully had not only a proper bed, but two self-inflating airbeds. Mick had taken over the fire, and Len made sure that Cisco was alright.

But now he was faced with a difficulty. What to do next? Cisco was here. He was safe. But he didn’t have his memory. 18 months of his life were missing. And was that necessarily a bad thing? They were the worst 18 months of his life. He’d lost so much, been betrayed, tortured, killed…

Cisco groaned and stirred in his sleep, and Len smiled, turning towards the fire to give the kid some space.

“Need to take him back to his team.”

“Mick, he doesn’t even remember what happened. There’s no way we can take him back now.”

“You know he needs them.”

“Needs a bunch of people who can’t keep him safe?”

“Those doctors can bring back his brain.”

“Is that a good thing though?”

“It’s his brain. We don’t control if he should have it or not.”

Len sat back in one of the chairs, sighing. “But he just escaped. I doubt that he can handle it all. What if his mind blocked those memories so that he wouldn’t break?”

“You’re not giving him enough credit. He’s a tough kid.”

“You don’t know what he went through.”

“Neither do you,” Mick grunted.

Len stared at him incredulously. “I’ve been stuck in his head the whole time!”

“You know what pain he went through. You don’t know for sure what caused it. You don’t know what words were said. You don’t know who had him. You don’t know how he coped with the pain. There’s a lot of things you don’t know.” Cisco stirred on the bed, and Mick and Len lowered their voices.

“Listen,” Mick began. “Right now he doesn’t know who we are. And if he goes online and does a search, the first thing that pops up isn’t gonna be how we bailed their asses out a while back with that creepy dude. No. It’ll be that we’re criminals, and known for robbing banks and killing people. He needs to be with the people that he still remembers.”

“But he doesn’t remember them. Barry only woke up a year ago, Cisco thinks he’s never met him.”

“But he’s not a criminal,” Mick insisted. “And he still remembers that doctor.” Len snorted, but Mick wasn’t done. “I know they did you wrong. But this isn’t about you or them. It’s about the kid. Right now he needs his team. You’re not gonna lose him. You’re in his head, they won’t keep you from him.”

Len sighed. “You’d better be right about that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took me way too long to write this. My cat kept trying to jump up on my computer and mess with me. Anyway, thank you for reading! Yay this is posted!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter today, I'm sorry, but I do have more plans! And things are gonna start piecing together really soon!

Snart grabbed Cisco's arm, dragging him out of the main dining room, and away from Dante, who Mick was eyeing with contempt. This wasn't how today was supposed to go at all. 

"Dude, you really shouldn't be moving that quickly," Cisco complained, holding his head in the hand that Snart wasn't dragging. "Seriously, have you never heard of a concussion??" 

"I don't have a concussion, Cisco." 

"You also don't have a good excuse for this, and you're holding my hand way too- ow!" Snart tightened his grip on Cisco's wrist to make a point, but felt his own wrist start to ache painfully. 

He turned into a room, shoving Cisco inside and locking the door behind them. He faces Cisco then, arms crossed as he stood between Cisco and the door. Cisco crossed his arms and glared back. 

"Where did that fear go? You were terrified only a few minutes ago." 

"Oh, fear? That went the way of the dodo bird. It got replaced by this thing called anger when I realized that the voice in my head was a CRIMINAL!" Cold frowned. He knew what he needed to do. But this was different. He'd never hesitated in killing before... "And you knew, didn't you. You kidnapped me KNOWING who I was!" 

"Knowing, no." Cold frowned as his thoughts shifted, the kid rooting through his mind trying to find the truth. "...I may have suspected." 

"Was this even about the guns?? About Dante?? And don't bother lying, I can hear the headache forming when you do." 

Cold didn't think too hard on that one. "It was a test," 

h"Testing to see if it was me." Cisco shook his head. "Well, now you have your answer. Are you gonna let me go?!" 

"You know too much. You have access to my head, and now you know it. I can't let you go now." 

"Oh great. What. Gonna kill me?" Cold sighed and raised his gun. Cisco just laughed. "Oh you still think you can, don't you? You idiot." 

"Brave words to say to the man about to kill you," 

"You're an idiot for pointing a gun at your life support system." 

Cold faltered. "...what?" 

"Didn't realize that did you?" The kid was laughing again. Nerves must have been shot. "This isn't my first time dealing with psychic connections. When Dante hit your head and I felt it? That goes both ways buddy, and for a lot more than sensations. You won't just feel me die, you will die, frosty." 

Cold thought for a moment, before lowering his gun.  _Just like in the dream..._

Cisco lost his hysteric mirth. "...what dream?" 

"Not important. So if I can't kill you, you're gonna have to come with us." 

Cisco shook his head. "No. No, you have to let us go!" Cisco lunged at Cold then, but Cold quickly caught his fist and sidestepped, twisting Cisco's arm around behind his back and driving him to the floor. 

"You think I won't hurt myself to teach you a lesson? I've got a stronger tolerance for pain than you, kid." Cold pressed down on Cisco's wrist, pulling tightly on his shoulder. Cisco bit back a scream, and Cold winced as the pain flooded his shoulder, but he held strong. "Why don't I make you a deal? Stop fighting, and I'll release your brother." 

Cisco stilled beneath him. "...You promise?" Despair ebbed through the connection, aided by the tiniest spark of hope. It bit at Cold to have made his connection something like this.

"I have no use for him, and there's no reason for me to keep him." He kept his voice flat and even, despite the hammering guilt edging his every word. "Merely the fact that I know where he is should be enough insurance against you doing something reckless now. So. Do we have a deal?" 

He could feel the kid thinking, thoughts weighing in his head, and his heartbeat out of control. Finally the anxiety dissipated and was replaced with acceptance and despair. Complicated emotions to be filtering through the connection so freely. "Fine." Cisco bit out, and Cold let him up, rubbing at his own aching shoulder. 

Cold left the room, locking it behind him. He had plans to make. And a wave of grief to ignore. 

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Len makes a very difficult decision. And sets some stuff in motion. Yup. (Flashback.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My brain is dead. English has failed me. Bye bye. Have fun reading.

They switched safe houses after letting Dante go. Cisco had glared at Cold as he led him into a small bedroom. "Everything you should need, bed, blankets, bottle of water if you need it," 

"No window," Cisco muttered. 

"And a locking door. Don't think I believe for one second that you won't try something. I can hear your thoughts too, remember?" Cisco glared, but didn't deny it. "...Look, this isn't how I meant for this to turn out," he tried. 

"No, you just planned on listening in on the Flash's plans. Using me as an unknowing leak." Snart didn't even try to act embarrassed. "The Flash will catch you. And he'll find a way to break this connection." 

Cold sighed, leaving the room. "You put a lot of faith in a man who wears a mask." A brief image of brown hair snuck through the connection as Cold locked the door =, but he didn't push the connection for more details. He had to respect boundaries somewhere. 

 

_You killed Nora Allen,_

Snart opened his eyes in a snap, but what they saw were two different things. One eye registered the red lights of the clock, blinking a steady 3:00 AM. The other...

He was looking into a bunker. Military, by the looks of it. And a man was standing-

Harrison Wells. 

Harrison wells was standing. Grinning. And...  His pulse increased as the thought broke through.  _He's going to kill me._ The dream came back to him in a surge of panic and he bolted upright, stumbling out of bed as he navigated with one eye, the other still stuck in whatever Cisco was seeing. Pieces of the vision skipped, as if playing off a faulty record. But he felt the tears from the dream again, felt the pain as Wells shoved his fist through Cisco's chest,  _how is that possible?_ And for a brief moment saw the...remorse? Remorse, on the murderer's face before he found Cisco's door and the dream blanked out. 

Len hauled the door open and flicked on the light as Cisco jolted up, eyes wide and hair wild. They stared at each other in silence for a moment. 

Cisco was the first to break the silence. "Dude, what the h-"

Snart cut him off. "What was that?" He winced at the rawness he felt in Cisco's throat. Cisco had been screaming. How could he not have heard? If he hadn't sent Lisa and Mick to another safe house as a diversion, he was sure they'd have already been here too. 

"...You saw that?" Cisco was quiet now, and Len was reminded of the time he'd woken up Lisa from a nightmare after their father had gone after her. She'd shrunk into the sheets the same way, head held down as if it would keep the fear from leaking out. 

"Cisco, what was that?" He asked again, stepping towards the bed slowly, as if approaching an injured animal. "What you saw...what's happening?" 

"I don't know, alright?" he was breathing heavily, and Len could feel his own pulse increasing. He sat down lightly on the bed next to Cisco. "I don't know. A dream? Just... someone put some idea in my head, and ever since it's been...at first it just got under my skin, but then a few nights ago I started having nightmares," 

"Cisco I've felt your nightmares. I've never physically seen one before. This was different." 

"Well I don't know!" he shouted, gesturing wildly, and Len caught his hand, bringing it to his own chest and taking a few deep breaths. 

"Cisco, just breathe with me, alright? Just breathe. You're having a panic attack." 

He nodded, focusing on the breathing. After a few minutes Len spoke again. "Why would you have nightmares about your boss killing you?" 

Len kept Cisco's hand on his chest, still letting him focus on breathing even as he spoke. "There's this man... he can do what B- what the Flash can do," he corrected himself, and Len ignored the slip. He'd get a name eventually. "And he killed the Flash's mom. A long time ago." Oh, so the hero had a backstory? "We nearly captured him back at Christmas, but he got away. Killed a lot of people in doing so. Someone... someone recently suggested that it might be Dr. Wells. But I ignored it. Now...now it's just stuck in my head." 

Len thought back to the dream he'd had. About how real it had felt, and wondered if there was a chance it had actually happened. Unlikely, but in a city full of men running faster than the speed of sound, and turning into poison, anything was possible. 

He considered speaking his thoughts, but then glanced over at Cisco and realized that the kid was just coming down off of a panic attack. No reason to worry him any further. 

"What do you call this man?" 

"...The Reverse Flash." 

 

He'd figured a heist was what he needed to get his mind of things. Like the fact that he now had a very vulnerable weakness that could be used against him. Or the fact that someone was going after that weakness at this point in time, trying to kill him. The Reverse Flash, in particular. He hadn't mentioned this to Cisco, but Len was sure that he'd died. That somehow, Cisco had died. Or was going to. And there was nothing he could do to stop it! 

Aaaand he was on this heist to STOP thinking about it. 

He'd specifically chosen something small with no alarms and minimal security to avoid attracting any attention. A small jewelry store with ties to the mob. 

But a few moments after he iced the display, he felt lightning crackling behind him. _Told you the Flash would find you,_ he heard. He rolled his eyes at Cisco's pettiness. He turned around, hands spread wide. "I take it Cisco placed a tracker in the gun."  _It's not petty when you kidnap me!_

"WHERE is he?!?!"

Snart was impressed. This was the most anger he'd ever seen in the young hero. "Chill, he's fine. Don't you think you're getting ahead of yourself there?" 

"Ahead of mys- you kidnapped him!" 

"And you're being aggressive." 

The hero took a deep breath, listening to the voices in his ear for a moment. "Alright, just...what do you want, Snart? How do we get him back?" 

There was a dangerous knife he was balancing here, Snart realized. Keeping the kid alive, staying out of jail, not biting off more than he could chew... things were wobbling unevenly. Unless...

"Let's make a deal, shall we? I'll give you back your engineer, alive, unharmed, but..." He stepped closer to the Flash, looking him in the eyes. "You have to meet me in order to get him. Outside the suit." 

The kid spluttered. "Wait, what? What are you- I don't know if," 

"Slow down kid, you look like you're about to choke on air. I'm just curious who I'm dealing with. So how about it. Your identity for the kid?" 

He started pulling down his mask, but Len grabbed his arm. "Not here, not now. Cameras, remember?" 

"When and where then?" He thankfully lowered his hands. This wasn't the point. 

"Saints and Sinners. Heard of it?" The hero nodded. Interesting. "Tonight. 2 hours. Oh...and leave the team out of this. No wires, no earpiece, no weapons. I'll do the same. Agreed?" The kid nodded before disappearing in the lightning. 

 

Cisco sat in one of the booths, enjoying waaaay too many french fries to be good for him. Still, Len wasn't about to argue with him. Mick sat across, mostly just as a protective source. Len stood at one of the pool tables, keeping an eye on anyone who entered the bar. He knew that Lisa was sitting at the bar, doing the same. 

When the Flash walked in Len knew. Cisco sat up a bit more, and a wave of calm and hope finally relaxed the small kiddo. Len turned around to look. 

...Barry Allen? The CSI? Adopted son of Joe West, his father was in Iron Heights. Good man. Talked about his son a lot. Len and Mick had both gone to him to get patched up back when they started out. 

No wonder this kid was the Flash. He just read 'bleeding heart' from a mile away. 

Len knew the moment Barry had spotted him. 

"You know I could just flash him out of here, right now, right?" 

"But you won't." 

Barry ground his teeth. "What more do you want Snart? You said you'd give him back if I told you who I was. Is that what you're waiting for? To know who I am? My name's-" 

"Everyone who's done their research on the CCPD knows who you are Barry, that's not what this is about." 

The kid sagged. "Then call your man off. You said you'd give him back, call your man off." 

"I will, believe me, I will. But first you need to know why." Snart glanced around, before pulling the kid close. "Don't tell anyone about this conversation," he hissed, before hauling the kid towards the back room. 

He relaxed marginally as the door closed behind him. The noise of the bar fading around the soundproofed room. "What is it that you want, Snart?" 

He sighed. "Surprisingly, nothing criminal. I want Cisco's safety. And he may honestly be safer with you. Despite your carelessness..." 

"You want him safe?? You're the one that kidnapped him!!"

"Someone is trying to kill him, Barry!" The kid shut up. "I can't protect him right now! I can't explain why, but his life is important, and I'm not capable of protecting him." 

"And I'm supposed to just...believe you?" 

"Listen. All I'm trying to do is warn you. You..." He sighed, trying to collect his thoughts. "I'm going to assume you know the name 'Reverse Flash'?" Barry grew silent. "I can't explain how, but there's strong reason to believe his next target is Cisco. And I'm not equipped to fight off a meta-human. I barely stood against you with Mick's help, and that's knowing you were coming and the fact that you care about the side man. You're predictable like that." Barry bristled, but Len kept going. "You are. Anyone can tell that you'll put yourself in danger to save someone else's life. It's predictable. But this man will kill anyone in his way. I'm not going to pretend like I can keep up with that. But you stand a chance. You're his best chance at survival. So get your proud head out of your ass and listen to me.

"You can have Cisco back. But you need to protect him. I don't care what it takes. But don't let him die." He thought for a moment, before deciding to bluff his way through it. "If he dies, I will come after you, and I will kill you." 

Barry nodded. "I'll protect him. Don't worry. I'm not gonna let him get to Cisco too." 

"You'd better not." 

This was a horrible idea. The kid had already let two of his team be kidnapped by Snart. There was no way he was going to be able to keep Cisco safe. But he stood a better chance at it than Len did. And that was what mattered. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...So, a lot of people are 'kid' to Snart? Yeah that happened. In my defense, he's much older than everyone. especially once he starts to REALIZE how young these people are. (Seriously. Nobody has their life together at that age.)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember that tag that I've had on this fic for the last 8 chapters? Yeah. This is where that starts. You've been warned.

The process of removing memories is a tricky business. In all the years he’d lived through, he’d never found an exact science to it short of lobotomy or brainwashing. Either of those would result, of course, in a dramatic shift in personality that would be noticeable. So both were out of the question. Still, Cisco couldn’t be allowed to remember.

So blunt force trauma it was.

 

A year and a half.

A year and a half was missing from his memories. Had Dante gotten a better attitude? Had Caitlin found someone else? Had Wells managed to do something to earn back the city’s trust? What about the meta-humans? What had happened with them?

“Your relationship with your brother was improving.” Cisco looked up from where he’d been staring out the window. “I can’t say just how much, you’ve always been quiet about that, but I know you were starting to get along more.”

Mick was outside, trying to find decent firewood. Len had offered to help, but Mick had scoffed. “You don’t know squat about good firewood.”

Cisco nodded, before glancing out the window again. “So, I disappeared 6 months ago?” Len nodded. “You were inside my head. Could you hear what was happening?”

His stomach turned and he shuddered, the secondary emotions feeding off of Len enough to answer his question. “I don’t know anything for sure. Our senses were linked, but you were too far away for most of it for me to hear your thoughts.”

“So someone took me? I was abducted?”

“Cisco…” Len thought about his words carefully. “I’m going to do everything I can to make sure that you stay safe. No matter what. Alright? The people who took you, they can’t do it again.”

“So you know who took me?” It was a simple question. There was no anger, or indignation. Cisco wasn’t mad that he’d kept it from him. “I had forgotten how clever you are, Cisco.” Len leaned against the wall, staring at nothing in particular. “I know the person who took you, yes. But I also know that he did everything in his power to keep you away from us. The man that took you has already been arrested. Where you went from there…I don’t fully know.”

They both looked up as the power died out. “Cisco get behind me,” Len hissed, drawing his cold gun. The blizzard started getting worse, and Cisco glanced around, trying to find something he could use as a weapon.

The door swung open and Len raised the cold gun in time to see Mick standing there, covered in snow, no firewood. “Snart there’s something weird goin’ on out there.”

Len ran out, watching the blizzard getting worse, with…lightning. That was lightning in a blizzard. No wonder the power had gone out.

“That’s thundersnow.”

Len turned to face Cisco “What are you doing outside? You’re still recovering, get back in the cabin!”

“Not a lot of good that does me! The power’s out and we’re gonna run out of wood soon!”

“We’ll make due till the power comes back on.”

“It won’t!”

“The kid’s right,” interrupted Mick. “We’re in the middle of the mountain, there’s not going to be someone coming out to fix it for a long time.”

“And I’m guessing you couldn’t find any firewood either?” Cisco was making a point. “This area doesn’t seem to have a lot to offer.”

“Nope. Mountain’s completely dry. Most flammable thing around here is the cabin.”

“Not happening,” Len interrupted, “that’s our only shelter during that blizzard.”

“And what about the fact that we can’t heat the place up?” Mick asked. “ We’re gonna freeze to death. Unless-”

“Cisco, get back inside,” Len ordered.

“But,”

“Now.” Cisco glanced between the two of them, then headed inside. “We’re not calling him.”

“Why not?”

“Because what do you think would happen? He’d take Cisco and leave us.”

“He’d get the kid out of this alive. And I don’t think he’s so heartless as to leave us in this blizzard.”

“He’s the reason Cisco’s in this mess!”

“You know he says the same about you.”

Len stared at him. “…How do you know that?” Lightning sparked around them as the Flash stopped running, standing in front of them and glaring. “ _Mick_.”

Mick just shrugged as Barry took off his mask. “When were you going to tell me you’d found him then Snart??”

“You know what happened last time I did, Barry.”

“That happened because you didn’t tell me soon enough.”

Mick backed up. “I’m staying out of this.”

“He needs to be kept away from that life.”

“He needs to be with his friends!”

“That he doesn’t remember?” Barry froze. “He’s got amnesia, kid. Doesn’t remember you, or me. He remembers Caitlin. He remembers Joe. But more than that he remembers Doctor Wells. He doesn’t remember being killed by him, he doesn’t remember that betrayal, and if we told him what happened he’d think we were lying to him. He’d cut us out of his life, and he’d probably end up in danger again.”

Barry was silent for a minute or two. “But he’ll trust Caitlin. He’ll believe her. And right now we need to get out of here. Fast.”

 

(Flashback)

Cisco sat down at his computer, thoroughly shaken. He’d lied. The entire time, Doctor Wells had lied to them. He’d killed Cisco, and could have done it again in an instant. He’d played all of them. Cisco had honestly thought he was going to die again.

Cisco ignored the concern flowing through his mind from Snart. That was the last thing he needed. Cisco sat at the computer and tried to help Barry find Eddie. They had to find him. Then his phone started buzzing with texts from Snart. Caitlin was starting to glance at Cisco, so he quickly answered a text.

_Yeah yeah, you were right, shut up already would you? I’m busy._

Cisco groaned as the phone buzzed again. 

_What do you mean I was right? Kid, what’s happened? You have to talk to me!_

Cisco just ignored the text, and focused on helping Barry. Eventually he just put his phone on silent.

An hour or two they were no further along, so they called it quits. Barry kept looking, yes. But Caitlin decided she wouldn’t be of any help that evening, and Cisco agreed. Cisco lived only two miles from Star Labs, so he decided to walk instead of bothering Caitlin for a lift. It would give him enough time to answer the texts from Snart.

_Okay, so maybe those dreams were a bit more than dreams._

The response was immediate.

_How much more?_

Cisco groaned.

_So, Barry went back in time, and the dreams were memories of that other day._

Cisco only had to wait a minute for the response, and he was reading it for a while.

 _I_   _thought you said you died in it? Kid, are you telling me that you died in another timeline? THAT’S what’s been keeping you up at night? What have you done to take care of this? Please tell me you didn’t do something dumb like confront him, wait. Does that mean he’s actually the reverse flash? Your boss killed you? Are you alright?_

Cisco thought for a moment before responding.

_It didn’t seem dumb at the time, and no. no one would be alright, but you already knew that because you’re in my head._

Cisco glanced up to cross the street, then dropped his head back to the phone as another text popped up. He knew they way home by heart at this point.

_I can’t help the fact that I can feel your emotions. You feel everything rather deeply. Are you safe?_

Cisco groaned. He’d been fine with Doctor Wells as a father figure. He didn’t need another super villain dad.

_Dude, what do you think? I thought he was going to kill me again, no I wasn’t safe! We had a plan, but it backfired on us! And now a meta’s dead and Eddies been kidnapped by his descendant from the future and we can’t find him._

The response was immediate, almost as if Cold had typed it out before Cisco’s text had come in.

_What did Barry do to keep you safe?_

Cisco rolled his eyes, pulling up the keyboard to shoot back a scathing retort to defend his friends honor, but a rough arm grabbed him and pulled him sharply into an ally, his phone forgotten on the pavement.

Cisco’s back slammed painfully into the concrete behind him, and he stared up at the form of his attacker.

The man’s face was in shadow, but his form was big and bulky. Like Mick.

When a punch landed into his gut he was sure of that comparison. He doubled over coughing, but the rough hands shoved him back upright only to land a solid punch onto his face.

“You’re one of them aren’t you. One of those ‘scientists’ who destroyed half our city. What’cha got to say for yourself, huh?”

Cisco grasped the side of his face, coughing up blood onto the pavement beneath him, reaching blindly for his phone.

A hand stomped down on his arm and Cisco screamed, pain coursing through his arm. A hand wrapped around his neck, hauling him upright. Cisco struggled to breathe against the hand, mouth open and working hand clenched uselessly at the wrist of his assailant who lifted him a solid foot above the ground.

“You destroyed our city. I’mma destroy you.”

All he could think of was the last text. _What did Barry do to keep you safe?_ Cisco didn’t want to blame his best friend for any of this, but he couldn’t help but wonder where Barry was as this went down.

Just as he thought he was going to pass out the hand dropped him painfully to the ground. He landed on his broken arm and cried out, pain threatening to knock him out.   
He began to regain his breath in time to see his assailant pull out a knife, then his hair was being yanked back and his neck was exposed.

The opponent grinned wickedly as he held the knife to Cisco’s throat, applying pressure.

“You gonna’ die. You know that? Any last words? I’m going to kill you, right here. Right now.”

Cisco clenched his teeth. “Last words? You better do a good job of it you bas-”

The hand in his hair clenched painfully, and Cisco just about cried out. “Oh don’t worry, you won’t be surviving this.”

Cisco closed his eyes, preparing for the end.

A beam of ice hit his opponent square in the chest, and sent the attacker toppling into a trash can. The man hit the concrete in an instant.

Cisco collapsed backwards, and strong arms wrapped around him, keeping him upright.

“Cisco, oh god, Cisco. Cisco, you have to stay awake for me, alright?”

Cisco stared up at him, confused. Then it made sense. The blade. His neck must be a mess right now. The knife might have even cut through skin.

“Am I bleeding?” Cisco asked, shaking.

Len nodded, goggles hanging around his neck and gun at his side. “Your neck. Don’t talk alright? We can get you to a hospital, and-”

Cisco shook his head. “Not hospital. Wells' monitoring them….your house?”

Len nodded. “Okay, I don’t understand but okay. Can you stand?”

Cisco nodded, turning to kneel on the ground only to cry out as his hand brushed the concrete.

Len took one look at the hand and slid his arms under Cisco’s knees and shoulders, carrying him out of the ally.

Cisco blinked sleepily at Len, wondering how he’d gotten someone who cared so much stuck to his head. 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long! My muse decided to take a long nap, and wouldn't wake up. I think she's starting to wake up again, but I've got so many muses clamoring in my head it's hard to tell. 
> 
> Thank you so much for your comments! They mean the world to me, and they're the reason I still keep forging ahead. Thank you!

Len was sitting on a chair in the cortex, arms crossed as he glared at Barry who for his part sat across from him, mirroring the stance. Cisco had latched onto Caitlin when they arrived, glad for the familiar face. She was running some tests right now, trying to locate the exact cause of the memory loss. 

"Concussion," she diagnosed, walking into the room. "Some form of blunt force trauma seems to have knocked the last few years from his memory."

Barry glared. "What did you do?" He ground out. 

Len raised his hands. "This wasn't me! Why would I do this, I don't even know how he could have lost his memory without me losing mine!" 

Barry glanced at Caitlin, who just shrugged. "I don't know that one either. I'm just guessing we should be glad that the strike didn't take your memories too." 

"Strike?" Barry had to confirm. "So this was intentional?" 

"Yes. Given the placement, even a centimeter off and it could have lead to either death or paralysis. So either he's extremely lucky, or someone was trying to get him to forget something." 

"Well they succeeded," bit out Len, "he doesn't remember anything. And given what he's been through, that's probably for the best." 

"For the-for the best?! How is this for the best?!" Barry stood up, and Len rose to his feet as well. 

"You haven't lived in his head for the last 2 years, especially the last few months. You didn't feel the things he went through. I did. He shouldn't have to remember the torture that he's been through!" 

"We have a different problem," Caitlin interrupted, before the two came to blows. "He doesn't remember about Wells." 

Barry paled, and Len nodded. "That's gonna be a problem, he's going to want to know why his boss disappeared," 

"Not just that..." Barry seemed...embarrassed? That couldn't be right. "...the real Harrison Wells, from Earth-2, offered his help in fighting the new speedster that showed up a few weeks back. He's been helping us." 

Len nearly blew a gasket. "You brought the doppelganger of a murderer into your labs?! And you said I took too many risks with Cisco's health!?" 

"I've run the tests, he seems legit." Caitlin offered. "And we even had Garrick confirm his identity. Now, we're not trusting him right off the bat, but he has been helpful so far. He just helped us catch one of the metas Zoom sent. And we're not exactly leaving Cisco alone with him, but there's no way we can stop them from crossing paths. And that's going to need explained." 

"Fine. You want to tell him that his boss was an evil speedster who murdered Barry's mother, and killed him? And that there's another universe where he's not a murderer too? Fine. Do you think he'll believe you? Any of you? He wouldn't even believe it if Caitlin told him. He didn't even believe it when it first happened." 

"I take it you found your friend," a voice said behind Len. It made even him shiver. He turned, hand straying to the gun on his hip as he came face to face with Wells. "Oh great, what did I do to you?" He seemed bored, despite the near threat of a gun. 

"You're the other earth's Wells?" Len asked. 

"No, I'm the ghost of Christmas past. What do you think?" 

Len glanced at Barry, and the look said it all.  _This is Harrison Wells?_

 

 

(Flashback) 

His back slammed against bricks and he winced as he hit his knees falling down. This place was...remote. Everything electric was under lock and key, and there wasn't another house to be seen for miles. It was the third time he'd tried to escape already, each time getting thrown back into his prison. Granted, it was a nice prison. Impressive architecture. In other circumstances Cisco would have called it a mansion. But seeing as he was unable to leave, he figured that fortress was a better term. A complete fortress, that he had no control over. And he couldn't even sense Len anymore. He had no idea where he was, except that it was cold. Not exactly freezing, but certainly colder than it had any right to be in late June. The necessity of a sweater, for example, was hardly usual. 

He winced as he flexed his arm, the bones barely healing. Thankfully he no longer needed the splint, that had been unbearably annoying. But without it it hurt worse when he was thrown back into the walls of the fortress. This time he'd managed to make it a good mile before he'd been found. But he got the idea he was allowed to wander. Allowed to get his hopes up, only for them to be dashed. One mile out, and he still saw no signs of civilization. He hadn't even made it to any forests. What surrounded them was barren rock, with rivers and mountains in the distance. 

As long as he stayed within the gates, he was fine. A wall ran around the entire length of the estate, and as long as Cisco didn't go further than the wall, he wasn't in trouble. He was free to wander this prison as much as he liked. Not that there was any good in that. His prison had been specifically designed to not let a soul out. He was sure of it. Then again, staying put and twiddling his thumbs didn't do him that much good either. He was only safe for a part of the day. Randomly, his captor would drag him indoors, questioning him and torturing him if he didn't answer. It wasn't much of a life. Cut off from society, held against his will by a psychotic man who regularly tortured him for information on his friends, and no way to escape. Nope. Not much of a life at all. 

A shudder ran through him as he stood, his arm still stinging from where he'd been thrown into the wall. "Perhaps it's time for questioning early, since you're so eager to be doing something," 

Cisco hated him. Hated him more than he had hated anyone else. He closed his eyes as electricity neared him, and despite knowing the foolishness, turned to run. He didn't get far. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so, I'm thinking about posting another fic that's been in the works for a little while. It's a Treasure Island AU. Thoughts? I'm definitely going to be posting it some time, but would you like me to start posting it now, or once I've finished with Frostbite? Let me know!


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry and Len don't really get along. Maybe there's a reason...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yup! I'm posting again! (I'm sorry it takes me so long! I swear I'm usually prompter than this! Work's had me stressed out beyond belief!)

 

(Flashback)

“What happened?!” Barry was through the door before Lisa had fully opened it. “There weren’t any meta-alerts, so what the hell happened?!”

Len was up before Barry got to the bed where Cisco was still unconscious. “This wasn’t a meta. It was just some thug mad at STAR Labs from what I could tell. But why was Cisco alone in the first place?”

Barry took in the state his friend was in. It didn’t look good. His arm was wrapped in several bandages, and a severe slit ran across his throat. His torso was wrapped in bandages too, and Barry was scared to touch him for fear it would hurt him further. “…We were trying to find Wells. He…he wasn’t who he said he was…”

“No, I know about that.” Barry looked up sharply. “He was the Reverse Flash, and now he has Eddie. What I want to know is why you still ran the risk of him kidnapping someone else from your team when one was already taken.” Barry opened his mouth, but Len wasn’t done. “And, while we’re on that topic, WHY were you setting a trap using your friend as bait???”

“How do you-”

“You knew he was in danger! You knew that someone wanted to kill him! Did I not tell you to protect him???”

“Woah, while I get that Cisco must have told you about his dreams, that hardly makes you some ‘patron saint’ when it comes to protecting him! Why do you care so much about what happens to him anyway?”

“You do realize it’s not just his life on the line, right? You do realize he wasn’t the only one who died in that timeline?”

Barry froze at the accusation, and Lisa took that opportunity to cut in. “While I appreciate the melodramatics, every minute you two spend arguing is another minute Cisco isn’t getting proper treatment. You can argue it out at those labs of yours, just get him the medical treatment he needs!”

Barry glanced between the two siblings, before lifting Cisco into his arms and flashing away. “I guess I’ll follow then,” Len muttered into the thin air where Barry had been standing. “Not like this conversation is done…”

 

Present:

Lisa was visiting, hoping it would jog some memories in Cisco’s head. Caitlin had been in the room, on Cisco’s request. There was nothing. No spark of memory. He couldn’t remember anything about her. She’d decided to stay in the room with him for a bit anyway, in case it helped. Cisco was fine with Caitlin leaving then, as he tried to flirt with Lisa.

“So you’re sticking around?” Len looked up from the monitor as Caitlin entered the room. She’d relaxed around him a lot more once Cisco had mediated those waters.

“For the moment. If he does regain his memories, I want to be here for it.”

“I seem to remember you saying something similar,” Caitlin began as she pulled up a chair in front of the monitors, “when Cisco first went missing.” Len glanced down, but Caitlin still tried to match his gaze. “I know what Barry said, but we didn’t agree. Alright? And we still don’t. We don’t know what happened there, but neither do you. And to the rest of us, that means there wasn’t anything you could have done. You did your best. That’s all we ask of anyone.”

Len looked down. Had he done his best? Had he really?

_He’d woken up tied to a chair, a gun pointed at him. He recognized the man holding it. “Been a while, ey Lenny?”_

_Len glared up at his father. “Last I heard you were rotting up in Iron Heights. Apparently they were wrong about that.” He glanced around the room quickly assessing his situation. He was in a warehouse, and there were two guards standing either side of the one door. They both had guns._

_“Got a few of the guards on my side, and had some of my men blow a hole in the wall so big that they’ll be sorting out the prisoners for a few days. More than enough time to get set up again. But then I hear about you, and your new weapon. And I figure… maybe you’ll want to help your old man out? You were always good at getting places I couldn’t.” Lewis lowered the gun now, as if trying to extend a branch of peace._

_Len glared. “Why don’t you let me out of these ropes so I can finish the job I started the night you went to prison?” A chuckle. Lewis didn’t seem too worried about the threat. “You know that if you let me out of these ropes I’m going to kill you.”_

_“Oh come on Lenny,” he snapped his fingers and one of the men disappeared into the door. “we both know your weakness.”_

_Len glared. “I don’t have weaknesses. You taught me that.”_

_Lewis smirked. “Well then you didn’t learn.” The man had come back, and pushed a bound and gagged Cisco into the room. Cisco’s eyes met Len’s for a brief moment before_

_Lewis stepped between them and pointed the gun at Cisco’s head. “So Lenny, are you gonna work with us? Or am I gonna blow his head off?”_

 

_Cisco had been bound to another chair, and Len had to force himself to avert his eyes as he helped his father with this plan. He couldn’t keep looking back at the mess the young man was in. He’d disappeared a month previously, and here he was again. Battered and bruised, but here. Lewis stepped out of the room to talk to one of the goons, and Len was by Cisco’s side in an instant. “Kid, I’m so sorry.” He pulled the gag out of Cisco’s mouth, cupping his face in his hand. “We’ve been looking everywhere for you!”_

_Cisco leaned into the touch taking a deep breath. “Len, are you alright? Is the team okay?”_

_Len nodded. “Yeah, yeah we’ve been good. Don’t worry, I’m gonna get you out of here, alright?”_

_Cisco nodded, and Len tried not to notice the wince. He’d felt some of the torture Cisco’d been through in the past month. He knew that Cisco’s back was a minefield of bruises, and that right now his head was killing him. “Cisco...I don’t know how much time I have, but did you notice anything that might help us escape? Anything in the time that they had you?”_

_“Um, other than the two exits that they’re standing by, there’s not really a way out. But if you get me close to one of the electric keypads they’re standing near, I might be able to rig it up and alert the Flash.”_

_“Alright, that’s good. I don’t know what Lewis is going to want from me but if he wants the cold gun then it can’t be good. Just worry about yourself right now, alright? I can’t let him hurt-”_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you SO MUCH for your comments! They make my whole day, I swear. I'm gonna get to work on ironing out the characters in my Treasure Island AU soon then! Yay, I'm really excited!! Thank you for reading!


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cisco meets Harry. Cisco doesn't like Harry. Injuries occur.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the length between each update! I've got some time off now, so hopefully I'll be able to get a bit more in before stress takes hold again!

 

Caitlin said he was fine. That was good. No further brain damage past whatever had taken his memories. He stood up, stretching his arms and legs. He’d been sitting down for far too much of the day. Barry was out of his coma, he’d missed that. Or, apparently he hadn’t. He’d just forgotten about it. Does that count as missing it?

He was checking up on his computers and their systems when he heard a voice that sounded somewhat familiar approaching. He turned around just in time to see-

Harrison? Standing? What was happening here?

Harrison stared at him for a moment before speaking. “No. I’m not him.”

Cisco blinked. “…You’re not who?”

“Your earth’s Harrison Wells. I’m from another earth.” He made some gesture with his hands, almost like a greeting, then moved around Cisco and into the room. He picked up a marker from the drawing board and started writing.

“I’m sorry, you’re from another earth?” Cisco asked, trying to wrap his head around it.

Harrison, or not Harrison, Harry? Looked back at him. “I just said that.” Then he got back to work.

Cisco stared then shook his head. “Okay, that clears nothing up. What happened to our Wells?”

Harry looked back at him again. “Your Wells-were you not here for-?”

“Hey, Harry?” Cisco interrupted, exhausted by this weird man in front of him. Harry shook his head at the nickname. “I’ve got memory loss, okay? You’re dealing with amnesia brain over here, so talk me through this. What happened to our Wells?”

“Well, from what I gathered he got erased from time when his ancestor killed himself.” He turned back to the drawing board, oblivious to the bombshell of information he’d just dropped on Cisco. “If you want more answers ask Allen. I think he said something about being in the pipeline trying to convince Doctor Light to join the good guys.”

 

Cisco was practically running through the hallway, trying to find Barry, or Caitlin. Doctor Wells was dead? What had happened?! He stopped as he entered the pipeline. Barry wasn’t there, but neither…neither was Doctor Light. He’d heard them say they were keeping her in the pipeline, so where was she?

He opened the door to the makeshift cell, trying to get a closer look. He took a few steps forward, only to have a hand grab him by the back of the head and slam him into the wall, knocking him out.

He thought he’d wake up in the cortex, but for some reason he was in the bunker. He shook his head, wondering what he was doing here, when he saw some kind of…force field? In front of him. He couldn’t understand why he was already standing, but there was a man standing before him. A man…vibrating. A man dressed in yellow.   
This is a dream, he realized, as his dream-self moved through the actions of checking measurements that he didn’t even understand. It looked like the information was fluctuating though, even though the readout said the capacitors were fully charged. Weird.

Weirder still, when dream-him turned around to see Harrison Wells standing. Again.

Was this Harry? But no, no that was Harrison. He knew, somewhere in his bones, that the man before him was Harrison Wells. Who was grinning. And-

Oh no

He was confessing to a murder. The murder of Barry’s mother-how was that possible?

Something terrified him. Something crept into his mind and he didn’t know where it came from but he’d seen enough movies to put two and two together.

Dr. Wells was about to kill him.

He tried to reach out, to call out, to scream, or something, but he was stuck acting out some sick scene that lead to him dying.

This is just a dream, he muttered inside his own head. This is just a dream, you can’t actually die, this isn’t real, this isn’t happening! Wake up! But that didn’t stop the pain as his hand phased-phased! Through his chest and he felt his heart physically being broken.

”Cisco!”

He jolted up, into the arms of Caitlin and Len, wincing at the sudden movement and the pain of the light.

He was actually in the cortex this time, but he didn’t want to focus on the scenery. He wanted his head to stop hurting.

“Just lie down there, your head got hit as Doctor Light escaped,” explained Caitlin.

Len sat down next to Cisco, turning off the light next to the bed. He could feel the pain it was causing. Caitlin was about to go, when Cisco asked “Is Dr. Wells really dead?”

Caitlin looked back to Len. They’d been hoping to hold off this conversation a bit longer, maybe till his memories started to come back on their own. But there wasn’t really a good way to hold off. How had he found out? “I’m afraid so. Get some rest, we can talk about it when you’re feeling better.”

Cisco nodded, or at least tried. He winced the second his head started to move. “You know,” he began, speaking to Len. “I had this weird dream.”

“Really?” Len asked, smiling down at the kid. “What happened?”

“Dr. Wells was cured. But then he killed me. That was kind of rude, don’t you think?” Len froze, but Cisco didn’t see it, eyes closed as he drifted off. “Not to brag, but he wouldn’t get better without me. That just wouldn’t happen.”

Len’s breath caught in his throat. The memories were returning. How long till he remembered everything then?

 

(Flashback)

Cisco shook his head as Lewis had one of his men drag Len away, unconscious. “He’s your son, how can you do that to him?!” He wasn’t ready for the blow when it came. He looked up, his cheek throbbing in pain, surprised it hadn’t knocked him unconscious. Lewis brought his hand up, the butt of the gun dripping from Cisco’s blood. Cisco spat out the blood in his mouth. “Is that all you’ve got?”

Lewis laughed. “You’re brave kid. I can see why my son likes you. But just because you’re brave doesn’t mean you’re smart, so I’m gonna dumb this down for you.” He released the safety on the gun, bringing it up level with Cisco’s eyes. “You try anything to get away, and one of these goes between your eyes.”

Cisco gulped, staying silent, and Lewis lowered the weapon. “You think he got the message?” Lewis asked one of his men. He turned back to Cisco. “I don’t think he did.” With one movement he brought the gun up and fired a shot into his upper leg.

Cisco couldn’t bite back the scream this time, it tore out of his throat as the pain sparked through his leg. He slammed his back against the chair, hands grasping the armrests as he fought for control through the blinding pain.

“Keep a clear head kid,” Snart Senior called over his shoulder as he left. “Or I can make your death slow and painful.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, yeah! I know where I'm heading with this now. Oh, and if you're interested, I just started posting my Treasure Island AU! Anyway, thank you so much for all your lovely comments. I can't tell you just how much they mean to me. Seriously, you guys are why I keep writing. Thank you!!!


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cisco starts to come back a little.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, I wanted to give you guys some comfort before I got back into the extreme hurt that I send my favorite characters through. Don't worry though. There's much more pain to come. *evil laughter* 
> 
> This chapter was especially hard to write, as my kitten kept deciding that if something was moving and she couldn't see it, she would pounce. Which led her to knocking down my screen on multiple occasions. So, yeah. Cuteness impacted the chapter.

(Flashback) 

There was a specific trait that made Caitlin look worried and terrifying simultaneously. When she was calmer he would ask if it was in her genetic code.

“Francisco Ramon have you lost your mind???”

He winced, sitting up and reaching for the light to turn it down. Then he noticed his arm, thoroughly covered in a cast. He stared at it for a couple seconds before the attack from last night came rushing back.

“Oh damn….”

“’Oh damn’ is right. When were you planning on telling us you had a psychic connection to Leonard Snart?!?”

He stared at her. What was she-

Oh yeah. Len had saved him. He’d been bleeding badly. Of course Len would take him back to STAR labs. And of course that meant that he’d told them about the connection.

“To be fair, I only realized it was him a short while ago, and I figured you guys would think it was impossible.”

Caitlin gestured around herself. “In this city??”

Cisco tried to sit up further but Caitlin grabbed his shoulders, pushing him gently back onto the bed. “You barely survived. And if it hadn’t been for Snart you wouldn’t have. Lie down and rest.”

He glowered at her. “I want to talk to Len!”

“I’m right here you know,” the familiar voice drawled from the doorway where Len was leaning. Cisco grinned at him.

Caitlin spoke first however. “I’ll let you two talk, but then I’ll be back in a few minutes to do a full diagnosis of what’s going on here. If you two have powers then I’m going to figure out exactly how they work. This might not stop at hearing each other’s thoughts.”

She walked away, and Cisco shook his head. “She’s gonna be holding this over my head for a few days at least.” He glanced back to Len. “Dude. You totally saved my life back there.”

Len nodded. “I guess I did.”

“That makes you a hero…”

“Definitely not.”

“Oh come on!!! That would be awesome! You and Barry could team up, we could all get ice cream together,” he let out a short giggle at the thought.

“Wow. Loopy, giggles, delusions of heroics, combine all that with the general lack of pain I’m sensing, you must be on a ton of painkillers.”

Another giggle. And then Cisco reached up with his good arm and grabbed Len’s hand. “Sit. Caitlin’s gonna come in in a minute and she’s gonna be scary.”

Len arched an eyebrow. “The doctor’s scarier than me?”

“Dude you haven’t seen her. Ronnie was like-the only one that could get through to her. I mean, she’s nice and all, but when you do something reckless: I swear she’s gotta be some kind of meta with how scary she gets. It’s like she can get inside your head!”

Len nodded, something unreadable on his expression. Unfortunately, Cisco wasn’t quite out of it enough to lose touch with Len’s mind. In a moment he started crying. “You-you were worried! That’s so sweet!! You were so scared!! Oh my goodness you do care!!”

Len glanced around alarmed, glad that no one was in the room at the time besides the two of them. “Cisco, it’s fine. You can stop crying, alright? Cisco?” Cisco nodded, but still started tugging on Len’s arm and wouldn’t let up till he’d succeeded in pulling Len into an awkward hug on top of the medical bed.

“I’m okay, okay? I’m perfectly fine. You can check for yourself, see?” He sniffed, sitting up and grabbing Len’s arm, bringing it to his chest where his heart was beating. “It’s all fine. I’m okay. You did it. You saved the day.”

Len didn’t point out that he could see Cisco’s heart on the monitor, and that there was no need for all this physical contact. Instead he just nodded, letting Cisco think he’d solved the issue. “Glad that you’re alright there, Cisco.”

 

 

He had powers. He hadn’t told anyone else yet, unsure of how they would react. But…but he had powers. He was certain of it.

Just as certain as he was of the fact that what he’d seen when he accidentally brushed shoulders with Harry was real. He had a daughter. And his daughter was in danger. No wonder he was so rude to everyone.

Then again, maybe the rudeness was just him. Cisco had no way of knowing. This whole business of Dr. Wells being some kind of evil killer from the future should have bothered him more. But…it was like he already knew. Probably because he already had known.

They were working on luring out this evil speedster, Zoom. Well, Caitlin and Barry were. But it seemed like they had it covered. He’d asked if he could do anything to help, and had been informed that he should just rest and recover.

Nope.

So, instead, he went to look for Len. He was somewhere in the labs, right?

He wandered the halls that remained constant, despite the year + of missing memory. Eventually he encountered Len in one of the break rooms that had been installed before the accelerator blew. “What’re you doing here?”

Len looked up. “Avoiding the two workaholics. I figure if they need my help they’ll come find me. You?”

Cisco shrugged, settling into the couch next to Len and staring at the tv. “Same. What’re you watching?”

“Sherlock. They say Netflix is getting rid of it in the next month.”

“No way! I love that show!”

“I know,” Len chuckled. “You introduced me to it.”

Cisco glanced over to him. “…I’m sorry I don’t remember our friendship.”

“It’s alright, it’s not your fault.”

They fell into a comfortable silence then, watching the show together and enjoying the reprieve. It was nice, knowing that no matter what happened, this was still a constant in his life. Cisco needed that.

Len couldn’t say when it happened, but before the end of the episode Cisco had fallen asleep on his shoulder.

He was coming back to them. Finally.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for sticking through this! I cannot express just how amazing your comments are! We're starting to get closer to the big reveals, and getting towards the end! I'd estimate we're about half-way through? I've got the ending all figured out right now. Well....I know WHEN it ends. I have a timeline. (okay, so I haven't figured out the How, but I'll get there.)


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lewis.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy. COW! Okay, long chapter ahead of you! Sorry it took so long to write, my brain didn't want to work and then it did and I think I just pumped this out in 2 hours....? YIKES!

The first thing Len processed as he came back into consciousness was pain. His head was throbbing, but that wasn’t the main source. For some reason, his leg felt as though it were on fire. He reached down for it, despite his hands being tied together, trying to feel for the injury. There wasn’t one. Which meant-

Cisco.

Damn Lewis that son of a bitch he was going to kill him.

He took stock of his surroundings, opening his eyes to peer around and asses his situation. He was lying on the cold cement floor, hands bound and one obvious exit. No vents or anything for him to sneak through. He sat himself up, wincing at the increase in nausea as he did so.

The door opened and Len did his best to hide his anger. If Lewis knew that he and Cisco were connected then neither of them were getting out of that warehouse alive. They’d get out of course. Most likely in body bags…

“Since it seems I can’t trust you to behave in the same room as your friend, I’ve removed you to this room. Make no mistake, if you try anything like what you did he won’t be leaving. And neither will you.”

Len’s blood ran cold at the sight of blood on the end of his father’s gun. “What did you do to him?” the ice in his tone unmistakable.

“Nothing fatal. I can change that. Now are you going to work with me? Or do I need to find someone else to use that gun of yours?”

Len was half tempted to tell him where he could stick that gun. But that wouldn’t save Cisco. Only working with him would. “So you’re breaking into an office? I don’t see why you need my gun for that. Unless you’re saying you can’t even break into a simple government building. I doubt it even has security.”

“Oh I don’t need your help. Like I said, I just need someone to use that gun of yours. Because no building truly needs security anymore. Not with the Flash around. But that gun, it can stop him should he show up. So what’ll it be?”

Len had a choice to make then. Pull a heist or let Cisco die. Not really much of a choice there.

“Just tell me what needs done,” he bit out.

 

The disbelief and shock when Barry stopped him was obvious. “Len?? But…Lisa said you were kidnapped!” he hissed, snagging a letter opener from off a desk in the process.

“I’m doing just fine, Barry, now run along.” He shooed Barry, hoping to get him to leave before his father came back. Because if it came down to Barry or Cisco, he knew who he’d pick. And he’d have to live with that regret for the rest of his life.

“Len, whoever these people are, we can figure it out. They can’t make you do anything.”

Okay, so subtly wasn’t getting through to the kid. Maybe honesty actually was a good policy with him? “Actually they can. They happen to have a… _valuable asset_. In a precarious position. I can handle it though.”

Recognition finally sparked in the kid’s eyes. “Cisco… I can help. Just tell me what’s going on. Tell me where-”

Len heard Lewis coming back and made a snap decision. If Lewis got ahold of Barry, he’d kill him. He just had to make it look like Barry wasn’t a problem. “I’m sorry Barry,” he whispered as he pulled out the cold gun and fired it, keeping it on the lowest setting to give Barry the best chance at surviving. He’d taken a stronger blast from the cold gun before.

As the Ice wrapped around Barry’s torso, pinning him to the ground right as Lewis walked around the corner. He didn’t have time to explain this to Barry. He just had to hope that the kid understood.

 

Len knew that once they were back at the warehouse Lewis would steal his gun again. So he just had to figure out how to keep his gun on him. The answer came to him as they pulled into the warehouse. The guards Lewis had hired had seen the van approaching, and had retreated inside. Len reached up from where he’d been sitting in the backseat, yanking the emergency break and blasting the door to the van with the cold gun. As it fell away he jumped out of the vehicle and sprinted towards the warehouse. He had precisely 82 seconds to get inside and find Cisco before the guards got to him first. Thankfully he’d managed to slip a small tracker onto him before being knocked unconscious.

He followed the pulsing light, letting it lead him to the engineer. Any time someone got too close they got blasted with a beam. He wasn’t going to be too late. Not this time.

 

Cisco didn’t know how long he’d been sitting in the dark room they’d dragged him into. There was some kind of light high above him. Too dim to see much, the battery was probably well outside of warranty. Somewhere in the pain and fear he’d started to drift off, coming around again at the sound of thundering boots headed in his direction. He barely had time to tense before two quick thuds indicated the dispatching of the guard, then the door slammed open, and suddenly Len was there. WITH his cold gun.

He slammed the door back behind himself and iced it, just in time from the sounds of it. The sound of bullets hit the door, and swearing. But that ice was at least a foot thick, reinforcing a steel door. It was going to take a bit more than a few bullets to break through.

Len immediately set to work on releasing Cisco’s ropes and examining the bullet wound. “It was a clean shot,” he announced after a few moments. “No complicated veins. Hopefully we can get you back to Caitlin and get you fixed up before the end of the night.”

He finally looked Cisco in the eyes. And Cisco could see what his mind had been telling him all night. The worry and fear buried deep, the anger simmering just beneath the surface, begging to be released.  And the hope too. The same hope that Cisco now felt. That maybe this hell could all be over.

He’d been missing for a whole month. Maybe now he could finally go home.

Before either of them fully realized it they had embraced each other, hugging as if the other would disappear if let go.

Finally though, they had to let go. The awkward angle was becoming too painful for Cisco’s leg. They sat cross-legged on the floor, both refusing to touch the blood-stained chair.

“Cisco…I’m so sorry. For what he’s done to you, I should kill him.”

“Hey, no. You shouldn’t do that just for me, alright? I mean you and Lisa had to put up with him for a lot longer. If you kill him it should be for your sakes. Not mine.”

Len stared. “Usually talking about killing people has you making a face and turning away. Why are you suddenly alright with it?”

“I guess I just…can’t have the same morals,” he shrugged. “Not like I used to. Not with what I’ve been through. I mean killing is still really wrong and all, but I’m starting to see it’s a lot less…black and white, than it should be.”

Len chuckled. “You’ve seen the darkness of the world. There’s no going back now,” he joked.

Cisco stared at him. “You were born into that darkness. How have you not killed him before now?”

“Believe me, I’ve wanted to.” Len stared at his hands. At the gun he clenched in them. “It’s not like I haven’t killed before. But…he’s my father. And I know that with everything that he’s done, that shouldn’t matter. And I don’t want it to matter. But…every time I stare at him, I can see it all over again. Every time I aim the gun, it’s like my fingers freeze. Like I myself turn to ice. And believe me, I want nothing more than to see him dead. To be the one to have put him in the grave. But I guess I don’t have it in me. Last time I tried I was at least able to get him locked away for a few years. But even that didn’t last.”

Cisco stared at him, nodding, hand resting on his arm. “You’re not going to be stuck forever you know. You’re going to get out. Somehow.”

Len nodded. “Maybe we should start by getting you out of here.” The noises from outside had died down by now. Probably the men going to get something bigger to blast the door in with.

“Do you think it’s a trap?” Asked Cisco.

“Almost definitely. But we still have to try.” He hauled himself to his feet, then reached down for Cisco. “We’ve got to be fast. I saw a garage on my way in, hopefully there’s something there we can use.”

A few well-placed swings with the chair had the ice falling away from the door, and Len hauled it open before lending Cisco a hand with hobbling forward.

They managed to make it back into the main room of the warehouse-the same one where Cisco had been shot-before running into trouble. Four guards were waiting for them, weapons drawn. These were close combat weapons though. Len sent out a wide beam of ice that knocked them down, but it wouldn’t keep them down for very long. He quickly leaned Cisco against one of the boxes and handed him the letter opener he’d picked up back in the office. “Jugular, eye, or ear,” he whispered, before stepping into the ring of armed men.

It was strange to observe Len fighting this close to him. Cisco could feel the adrenaline pumping through his veins, could hear the crack as Len’s fist collided with the jaw of one of the men, knocking him out for a lot longer. Then another was dispatched with a beam from the cold gun, and Cisco actually shivered. It was as if he were in the fight alongside Len, merely an observer of another’s body. He now knew what Martin Stein felt like. Well. He and Len didn’t literally share a body. That would get awkward.

The next two opponents were decked with uppercuts, quickly and efficiently. They may have been trained, but Len had fear on his side.

With good reason too.

Cisco saw him before Len. He wouldn’t have had any chance to warn him either, the gun going off before Cisco could open his mouth. All he could do was _will_ Len out of the bullet’s path, and willing someone to do something without saying it is about as useful as throwing paper in a flood and hoping it’ll serve as a dam.

But something happened. Somehow, Len did move. He fell to the side, the bullet trailing uselessly above his head, and he was now safe. From that bullet at least. He glanced up towards Cisco, who was staring slack jawed back at him.

“Our bond,” Len managed to get out.

“It’s getting stronger,” Completed Cisco, equally stunned.

Then they remembered the criminal who had fired upon Len. He was up in a second, weapon drawn and primed. But…but he couldn’t.

Cisco could feel it now, the terror he’d been talking about. The fear that paralyzed his hands as he tried to find the will to end it all. But he couldn’t.

Cisco’s teeth ached as Len clenched his jaw, tightening his hand around the gun. But still he couldn’t. Something was stopping him.

“You really think you’re gonna kill me? We both know you don’t have it in you.”

The memories flashed behind Cisco’s eyes, foreign. Raised voiced and terror. Blood, and violence. Arms grabbing his own and shoving him against a wall, pain lancing through him.

But they weren’t his arms. Cisco blinked the new memories away and focused on the scene before him. If Len didn’t shoot, Lewis would. He knew that. And even if the bullet weren’t fatal, there would be a second to follow.

_I want nothing more than to see him dead. To be the one to have put him in the grave._

So Cisco reached through the bond between himself and Len. He let himself float between their minds, found Len, and squeezed.

The beam was fatal, direct to the chest. Lewis fell, and Len sucked in a deep breath. He glanced across to Cisco, and mouthed a quick _Thank you_ before sinking to his knees.

 

They’d continued moving on towards the main gate, careful of any remaining guards who might be lurking waiting to exact some revenge after Lewis’s death. Len doubted anyone would be that loyal, but there was always a chance.

Eventually though, Cisco had to call it quits. He sat down, resting as he breathed through the pain shooting through his leg. Len glanced around himself. “I passed this area on my way in. We’re close. I’m going to run ahead and make sure the way is clear. Then I’ll be back for you.” Cisco nodded, to exhausted for words. “Here,” Len eventually decided, handing his gun to Cisco. “If anyone has the right to wield it it’s you.”

He moved forward, moving faster without Cisco there, and made sure there were no men still guarding the door. Once he got there he frowned. Apparently the door locked on the inside, and there was a keypad still waiting to be unlocked. He frowned at it, before trying in a few numbers that his dad usually used. After three failures, he finally got a successful beep. His triumph lasted for only a few seconds before his legs gave out from beneath him and he had to catch himself on his arm. Then the dizziness was gone.

And so was the warmth from Cisco’s presence.

He raced back, making the trip in 30 seconds. When he got there, Cisco was gone. And the cold gun was on the other side of the wall, smashed.

He was gone again.

 

(Present)

Cisco had been tinkering with tech to get to feeling like himself again. Granted a version of himself that he didn’t remember being.

He was currently seeing if he could figure out the workings of Len’s cold gun. It seemed remarkably familiar to something he remembered piecing together right before his memory blanked. But he couldn’t be sure what.

“Hey, Len?” He called out to the man who was pretending not to be staring at him like he was gonna disappear. “You know this weapon’s busted, right? That it can’t actually fire?”

Len glanced at him. “…it broke. I couldn’t bring myself to fix it.”

Cisco shrugged, despite the unease he felt at the other side of the connection. “Mind if I take a look at it?”

“Be my guest. I trust you with it.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the support you guys! Seriously, as soon as this is done I need to take time and respond to each of your lovely comments because I SWEAR you are what keep me going! Thank you so much! I'm gonna try to update more regularly!


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mending happens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter! So soon!   
> Okay, yeah, I mostly just cranked this chapter out because posting at 10:30 at night is a horrible idea, and I think I hit the wrong button because chapter 13 is there, but it never popped up on the feed, (I checked.) so I think most of you didn't get the chance to realize I had another chapter up. So! If you have not yet read chapter 13, please go back and do so! Thank you!

  

Zoom. He’d seen through their plan and completely destroyed it. Barry was in the hospital bed, and everyone was on edge.

 _He set a trap for us…_ floated through Cisco’s head like a disembodied voice, before shouts from the cortex snapped him out of his daze.

 

Joe was yelling in Harry’s face. And it looked like Harry was just going to let him. He’d completely lost touch with reality. If Joe tried to kill him Cisco wasn’t sure Harry would stop him.

“Joe, wait!” Cisco pulled him back, before addressing Harry. “Who’s Jesse?”

That snapped Harry out of his trance. “How do you-”

Then he reached for Cisco. “Jesse’s my daughter. Zoom, has her. But how do you…?”

“…I have powers.” Admitted Cisco. “If I touch someone, or something that belongs to them, I can sometimes see things connected to them. I saw her.”

Harrys arms clenched, but he was still trying to be gentle. “Is she…”

“She’s alive.”

Harry breathed in a deep breath, stepping back out of Cisco’s space. Joe was still mad at him, but not violent now. Everyone in the room could relate to what Harry was going through.

Cisco didn’t know it, but they’d all been willing to do drastic things to get him back.

 

Barry woke up without the use of his legs. That was a major blow. But then Caitlin decided to fill him in on Joe and Harry’s fight. And Cisco’s revelation.

“Dude, why didn’t you tell us you had powers?”

There was no accusation in his voice. Just joy and curiosity. “I don’t know. It didn’t seem like a big thing?” Barry and Caitlin both gave him a look that he knew to mean they weren’t buying it. Len just scoffed in the corner. “And, well, I wasn’t sure if you knew or not. I mean it didn’t get mentioned in the debriefing on everything I missed from my memories, but I didn’t know if that was something from the trauma or what. I was going to tell you, just, when I figured it out for myself.”

Barry and Len shared a look, silently agreeing not to mention the other thing they hadn’t told him in their debriefing.

“I’m here for you, okay? We can have our own powers club.” Barry grinned up at him. “If I ever get my legs back,” he added.

“Well in the meantime, someone’s got to defend this city. Cisco, do you think you can finish my cold gun?” Len spoke up from his corner, keeping his thoughts mute.

“Yeah, sure thing. I can have it operational in an hour.” Cisco hurried out of the lab to finish it, and Caitlin said something about taking a blood sample to see if she could find a cure for the paralysis.

Which left Len and Barry alone. In silence.

“So. Harry’s trying to find his daughter.” Barry tapped the side of his leg awkwardly. Len just nodded. “…I guess a lot of things get excused when trying to save someone, huh.”

Len glanced at Barry. “I thought I was doing what was best.”

Barry shook his head. “No… you did all you could. Neither of us had all the facts. I’m sorry for shutting you out like that.” Barry glanced over to Len. “Your cold gun stopped working?”

Len nodded again. “I left it with Cisco before he was taken. Whoever took him destroyed it. I couldn’t bring myself to fix it without him there. It would have felt like a disgrace to him.”

“That fight must have been fierce then.”

Len shook his head. “Actually, there was no evidence that the gun went off, or of any struggle. It was as if Cisco had just vanished. If it weren’t for the broken gun I would have assumed he’d just found another door.”

Barry paled. “You don’t think…we don’t know how long Zoom’s been here, you don’t think he took Cisco, do you? And then erased his memory so he couldn’t warn us?”

“I don’t know. But if he did, then maybe that’s why Zoom’s so much better than us.”

 

Cisco was finishing up with the gun when Barry wheeled in. And for a moment his mind tinged with images of that wheelchair on its side, and him digging into the matrix of it. But that couldn’t be right, so he just kept going.

“How’s it going?” Barry asked.

“Pretty good, I’m almost finished. It’s odd, I know Len said that I built this myself, but I never thought it would just… flow, like I already knew it. Maybe my memories are gonna come back after all.” He grinned. “Alright, that’s the last piece! Let’s see if this baby works.” He stood up, turning it on for a second, the whirring blue lighting up in his hands.

Then, everything was bathed in blue.

He saw himself in the wreckage of a train, holding a-vacuum? Yelling at Len. He was in the same suit he’d saved Cisco in, but this time he was scowling, aiming the cold gun at Barry, who was on the ground, encased in ice.

As quickly as the images had come they’d disappeared, and Cisco turned the weapon off before dropping it back on the desk. He scrambled backwards, breathing rapidly.

“Cisco? Are you okay?”

“Holy cow. Holy. COW. That can’t be right. But that means, that means Len’s not who he says he is!”

Barry had a grip on his arm, strong but soft, helping him calm down. “What did you see?” He finally asked.

“There was a train, it was on fire, Len was in a parka, and you were on the ground. Caitlin and I were there, along with Felicity. And…” He scowled at his friend, who had started laughing. “Bro, this is serious! Len’s gonna go evil!”

Barry shook his head, trying to reign in the laughter. “Cisco, I’m sorry, but that’s not the future. That was the first time we met. There’ve been a few people in the past year who started out bad and turned good,” _like the rogues_ Barry thought.  “And vice versa.” He tried not to think about Harrison. Whom they still hadn’t told the full truth to Cisco about. All they’d told him was that that Harrison had lied to them about something, and had gone away for a while.

Cisco let out a sigh and banged his head against the desk. “Dude! I totally needed to know that!” Barry chuckled, and Cisco felt his spirits lighten. Maybe that was Barry’s true power. Unending lightheartedness.

That would be quite the power.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so that last scene I've had written for almost a year now, but when I went back through my files I couldn't find it. BUT I found a ton of stuff I'd been looking for earlier, (So, yeah, a few things went differently in my first outline,) And a few things that I FULLY plan on using! VERY soon..... muahahahah!!!!   
> (Thank you for all your support!! You all are awesome!!!)


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eobard turns on the accelerator. And as a result...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, this is a really short chapter, but I just had to post this. I'm not sure what I'm going to post next. Part of me thinks that I should start updating Map a bit more, and another part of me just rediscovered the only fanfiction I ever finished writing. So..... *shrugs*

 

The pipeline was online. The pipeline was online, Barry had just run off after Eobard and-

All the metas were escaping.

Shawna knocked him off the platform and into the pipeline, before disappearing with the other metas into the facility. Joe and Len ran off after them after making sure that Cisco was alright, and Cisco found himself wishing that he carried a gun on his person.

He climbed up back into the hallway, making his way towards one of the breakrooms where he was sure to find something he could use. Well. If his broken arm didn’t get in the way.

His neck had healed enough that the only remaining evidence was a scar. He wasn’t sure that scar would ever fully disappear, but hopefully it would become less visible.

He was running full force now, his connection to Len shaky at best, and he had almost reached the doors-when the power died.

He froze in his tracks, digging out his phone and flicking on the lights. The metas must have disabled the power. That wasn’t good.

 

 _Dude, where the hell are you?_ Cisco sent across the shared link. He wasn’t getting anything from Len. There’d been a commotion on the other side of their link, and then everything had gone silent.

More silent than Cisco was being, as he crept along the hallways of S.T.A.R. labs, trying desperately to avoid the notice of one of the escaped metas.

Cisco glanced behind himself, making sure that he wasn’t being followed. The hallways weren’t always the easiest to understand, and he was mostly counting on the meta’s inability to find their way out. Still, one of them might be lucky.

He squeaked as he backed into a solid force, turning around to find himself face-to-face with Mark Mardon, the weather Wizard. Mardon growled at him, grabbing his arm tightly.

“You’re one of the scientists that had me locked up aren’t you? Where do you think you’re going?”

Cisco struggled to get out of his grasp, then screamed as Mardon twisted his already broken arm. Teeth clenched, Cisco snarled at Mardon. “Oh, he’s going to get you for that you son-of-a”

Mardon hefted him by his throat and trapped him against the wall, a solid foot above the ground. “You locked me away in that prison. Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t kill you now.”

Cisco hung from his grip, struggling to breathe. This wasn’t going to end well, he could feel it. He closed his eyes, preparing himself for death. Which is when his phone buzzed with a text. Mardon frowned, taking the phone from Cisco’s pocket to see what it said.

_Barry:_

_Joe’s gone back to CCPD to check on things, Iris is okay. Len got knocked out though, headed your way._

Mardon grinned. “You know Joe West? The man who killed my brother? Why is that not a surprise…”

Mardon brought Cisco down, holding him dangling in front of him. “Does that mean you’ve changed your mind about killing me?” Cisco managed to rasp out.

The look Mardon gave him was pure malice. “Oh believe me. By the time I’m finished with you, you’re going to wish you were dead.”

That was all Cisco heard before he was thrown onto the ground and a piece of hail hit him over the head, knocking him out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who saw THAT coming??   
> ...yeah, I know. Short chapter. I need to post more content. I seriously tried for an hour to come up with something to add to this. I found nothing. I am sorry.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cisco is gone. And Len will do anything to get him back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay! Not that long of a chapter, but it's here! It's written! And I'm getting close to some big stuff!!!   
> But with the big stuff comes big hurt.....

“Where is he??” Len came bounding through the doorway of the cortex, cold gun in his hand. Iris and Caitlin were there, staring at the monitors. On screen he could see the moving map representing Barry’s search through the city.

“…We don’t know,” Iris finally admitted, saying what Caitlin couldn’t. “We just got the power up again a few minutes ago, and we found his phone in one of the hallways. There’s no video of what happened, but all the metas are gone. Barry’s out there trying to find something.”

Len shook, trying to keep the anger and fear from getting out. “I’m going out there too. Maybe I can find something.”

He stormed out, grabbing an earpiece in case they found something. What worried him the most was that for the first time in months, there was silence from the other end of his connection. He couldn’t feel anything from Cisco. For the first time since the particle accelerator exploded, he was completely alone.

 

A few hours later, and he and Barry were the only ones still at it. Iris was staying with Eddie, who’d been found under the pipeline no worse for wear. Ronnie had come back, and was staying with Caitlin, while Joe stayed with the Professor and Clarissa. There was no telling just who would be next. Barry had texted the Arrow, who was on his way. Len had been trying for the last few minutes to try and focus on his connection, trying to pull on it and find Cisco. So far he wasn’t finding anything.

He stood, pacing around the cortex. “You got anything?” Barry was standing, staring hopefully at Len.

He shook his head. “For a moment, it felt like there was something. It’s too far off to tell though. Phantom senses. I’ve never felt it this weak. I can’t even hear his voice.”

Barry shook his head, going back to the computers. “Felicity is looking through all her satellites for any trace of meta activity, but nothing’s coming up. She’s going to keep tabs on all majorly populated areas, but so far nothing’s coming up.”

There wasn’t much else they could do. They knew that by all odds Cisco was taken by one of the metas that left Star labs that evening. Whether an escaping meta prisoner or Wells remained to be seen.  

Whoever it was had managed to get Cisco far away from them. Len was certain Cisco was awake now, the phantom feelings a constant reminder that he was still out there. But other than that there weren’t many senses that he could key in on.

Until something sparked painfully in his shoulder and Len collapsed to the ground, biting back a scream. His throat suddenly felt shredded and he was certain Cisco hadn’t been able to bite the scream back.

Barry was at his side in a moment, holding him upright as Len gasped for air. “Len? What’s wrong? What’s happening?”

Len tightened his fingers around his cold gun, needing it to anchor him. “Cisco. He’s…” he gasped as another bolt jolted through him and he tried his best to breathe, transmitting as much calm as he could as Cisco suffered. “Lightning. He’s being tortured.”

“Can you get a message to him? Figure out where he is?”

As quickly as the pain had started, everything cut off. It was as if the strings on an invisible puppet were suddenly cut and Len felt absolutely nothing. Not even the after effects of the pain.

 _He cut me off so I wouldn’t feel it…_ he realized. “It’s gone,” he muttered, staring at his hands as if they were to blame for Cisco’s suffering. “I can’t feel him. I think he severed the connection.”

He stood up sharply, grabbing his phone. “It’s one of the metas. They’re trying to get to us through him. It’s not Wells.”

Barry nodded, bringing up the list of all the metas that had been contained. “We’ve got 5 metas to work with. Shawna, Nimbus, Mardon, Bivolo, and Simmons.”

“It won’t be Shawna. I’ve heard of her. She’s not the torturing type.”

“She nearly killed Caitlin,”

“That’s killing. There’s a difference between that and torture. Torture’s much…”

“Colder?”

“I wasn’t going to make that pun in light of things, but it fits. So what we’re left with is an art thief, a hitman, and two robbers.”

Len shot off a few texts, telling his people to be on the lookout. “If one of them goes near my people, I’ll be able to have a word with them. In the meantime, I’m going to try to find Shawna. See if maybe I can’t get her to help. I have a feeling she’d be a little more cooperative with me.”

He turned to go, the memory of the lightning more motivation than any heist. Cisco needed help. And if their bond was for nothing else, then it would be for saving his life.

 

(present)

Cisco was sure there wasn’t a more aggravating person on the planet.  But here he was anyway, with Harry Wells, dressed as Evil Wells and trying to pretend to be a sociopath. Which…he couldn’t do.

They were taking cues from Cisco’s weird dreams. Because that’s honestly all Cisco could relate to when it came to ‘creepy Wells’. And what came out of Harry’s mouth was something that vaguely reminded Cisco of a teenager asking someone to their first dance. Except Harry was at least twice as old as Cisco. And reciting words that supposedly were said right before murdering someone. Yup. Not really the right vibe.

“Okay, try that again, but this time, up the creep factor, like, 100,” He muttered, rubbing a hand across his forehead. What came out this time was on the dot. Completely. So much so that the world began to fade to blue around him.

The image played out in front of him, etched in blue lines and streaking lights. He felt himself die again. Then he was back. Harry was at his shoulder, concern etched across his usually irritated features. “Ramon? Are you alright?”

Cisco brushed off the shoulder, standing up. _Odd, I don’t remember falling._ He nodded, quickly answering his phone and informing Barry that they were headed to the loft. This day just kept getting better and better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay! I'm going to update The Map again soon, but this 3rd chapter is fighting me. In the meantime, I'm going to get this done so I can start posting another work that I've been working on for a few years now :) (It's a personal favorite among my works!)


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cisco gets a few more questions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm posting stuff again? What is this? Do I actually have inspiration? What??   
> Yeah, this is a short chapter. I've got plans for where to go, but I just couldn't find anything else to fit.

He opened his eyes and instantly felt the absence. Len wasn’t there. It was a few moments before he realized that if Len were dead, then he would be too. He must just be too far away to feel him.

He sat up, staring around himself. He was locked in some kind of closet, no windows, no lights, and when he finally felt the door handle it refused to budge. Steeling himself up he focused all of his energy into his foot, kicking out at the door.

He yelped in pain, stumbling back as the door held. He crashed into the other side of the closet, wincing as his injured arm came into contact with the wall. This couldn’t be good for his healing process. He patted himself down for his phone before remembering that Mardon had taken it.

He closed his eyes, trying to calm the overwhelming panic that was starting to claw its way up through his chest. Freaking out now wouldn’t do him any good. Yes, he’d been abducted. But he’d been abducted before, and he’d survived that. Though…Mardon did seem to have more malicious intent than Len ever had.

  _Great. Abducted by Mardon, I can’t feel Len, and I’m locked in a closet. Can this year just end already?_

 

(Present)

He couldn’t believe how fast the year was going. Then again, not having any memories of the year, maybe it was going really slowly. But it was already early December, and he barely remembered anything of it. It sometimes felt like he’d just been found on that mountain.

And now there was a murdering psychopath on the loose, trying to kill a barista that Iris heard about from her old coworkers at Jitters? So, of course they were trying to keep her safe. And…bringing the Arrow into it. And apparently he had known who the Arrow was?

He’d just hung up with Caitlin. Joe’s partner had accidentally shot Harry, that was... well, Cisco felt sorry for him, but at the same time he understood where Patty had been coming from.

They were doing practice training to make sure everyone was up to par. For some reason they’d decided that Cisco should be paired up with Oliver, (could he call him that?) so as to get some self-defense training. Cisco was sure if Len hadn’t been out looking for the immortal psychopath he would have put a stop to it, but it was actually a decent idea. Cisco needed someone to stop him from being defenseless all the time.

It was nerve wracking to be sparing with the Arrow. The first few lessons about how to throw a punch Cisco knew already. He’d taken some minor boxing when he was in high school gym after all. But then it got more advanced. Then it got to complicated moves, and instinctive reflexes. They’d been throwing a few causal punches, Oliver calm and completely collected, Cisco panting and winded, when Oliver threw a punch that Cisco wasn’t ready for.

He saw the punch approach a moment past when he should have been able to respond, and then-

Then Oliver hit the ground, hard. Cisco backed up, staring at his hands. Barry was immediately in the ring, checking on everyone, but Oliver was getting up again. He grimaced, but shook it off.

“That was…unexpected. I didn’t realize you already knew how to fight.”

Cisco stared at his hands. “…I don’t.”

Concern was flooding Cisco’s connection from Len. _Kid, are you okay? What was that, why are you freaking out over there? Do I need to come punch a green superhero? Because I will._

Cisco just stared at his hands. “I don’t get it…I’ve never learned how to fight before… where did that come from??”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay! Let's see if I can KEEP posting, and finally get to the end of this fanfic!!! It's been a while, and I'm almost there! I just...Need...To Keep....writing.....


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some memories return, and we get a glimpse of where Cisco was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm posting again!!!   
> I'm so sorry it's been so long, I tried to work on Nano and... well... my muses all shut down. So! I'm back! And I plan on posting more really soon too!

He coughed as he hit the ground, clutching his chest as he sucked air into his lungs. He glared up at his captor, willing himself to stand up.

“Really Cisco? You have to know by now that it’s useless to try and fight.”

 _Ignore him,_ he reminded himself. _Ignore that blond bastard. Stand up and fight!_

Cisco lunged, anticipating the electricity that slammed into him. He anticipated it, but it didn’t stop it from hurting. He grit his teeth and fell, then rolled and lashed out at his opponent. The blow actually caught him, sending his opponent to the floor.

Cisco got back to his feet as quickly as he could only to be hit with another bout of electricity as a fist slammed into his gut. He collapsed onto the floor, trying to suck in air as his body spasmed from the electricity.

“Ready to talk?”

The electricity died down for a moment or two. Cisco gulped in air while he could. He glared up at the man, willing himself braver than he felt. “Fuck you, bastard.”

The electricity spiked again, and he couldn’t draw breath, slipping out of consciousness as the torture continued.

He came back around as he was being carried, eyes struggling to visualize the passing halls around him. He winced at each step, closing his eyes to avoid looking at the face of the man who had just been torturing him, and was now carrying him to his room. He could do without the mind games.

He winced again as he was laid gently onto the bed, then his captor left the room. It took over an hour for him to move, shifting his weight till he rolled off the bed, landing on the floor with an _oomph._

He could have done without that little ‘gift.’ He didn’t need to be carried to his bed like a child. Though, he supposed it could be worse. Mardon and Lewis hadn’t provided beds while they’d had him in their clutches.

He stood up, grasping the bedframe to keep himself from toppling over. A month of this and he still hadn’t broken. He was proud of himself for staying strong, but at the same time… how long till his methods changed to something Cisco couldn’t endure? How long till he caved?

Which is why he spent what free time he had between torture sessions and escape plans at the library.

Huge mansion: extensive library. That was nicer than he’d expected. The library vast. Useless, in terms of technological advancement, but vast. The books were outdated to say the least, most ideas over a century old.

When left to his own devices he would browse through the books. Some were adventures, some philosophy, others some… perverted distortion of romance. But the books that really interested him were the martial arts guides.

He’d taken martial arts before, enough to just get by, but that was all. He’d held up in a fight against Hartley, but anyone else and he was nothing more than a geek with fancy equipment. He planned on changing that.

By this point he could last a few minutes against his captor before he was downed. But every encounter he was lasting a little longer. Maybe if he learned enough, he could knock him out and get out of there. Find civilization. Call Barry. Be rescued somehow.

All he could do was hope that he managed this plan before he broke under the daily torture.

He pulled down a book from the shelf and opened it. Time to keep practicing.

 

(Present)

Len was over again. He’d visited a lot in the past few weeks. Making sure that Cisco was alright, that he was still there. Helping him through any memories that came back.

But tonight he sat on the edge of the couch, glancing over at Cisco every few minutes, but not saying anything.

“Hey, it’s okay. You already told me about it.” Len nodded, but still didn’t say anything. “It doesn’t matter. What matters is who you are now, not who you were a year ago.”

Len nodded again, staring intently at the screen. Cisco grabbed the remote and paused the movie. “Len. Look at me.”

Len finally did, and Cisco crossed his arms and glared. “Are you going to mope on my couch all day?”

“Cisco… I can still feel it.”

“Yeah. Of COURSE you can still feel it. The memory just came back. But you told me about it already, so it wasn’t ‘unexpected’. Just a little painful, and it’s gonna fade.” Cisco reached over and lightly punched Len in the arm. The one that didn’t hurt.

“But I did this to you. I’m the reason you’re in this pain.”

Cisco groaned. “Dude! That was a year ago!”

Len sighed, reaching out slowly to Cisco’s shoulder. Cisco stayed still, patiently waiting and exuding as much relaxation as he could.

The man’s hand curled around the shoulder. The same one he’d wrenched so painfully when he found out Cisco was his voice. He gently followed the veins, making sure everything was in place.

“What, are you gonna make me take of my shirt so you can see that it’s fine?” Cisco was joking, of course. But Len still began to withdraw his hand.  Cisco reached out for it immediately. “Hey, no. It’s fine, you don’t have to-”

The second Cisco’s hands brushed Len’s the world shifted into the blue tints of his vibes. He found himself in a warehouse, with Len facing his father, weapon drawn. He saw himself, hiding behind the crates, blood leaking from the wound in his leg. He felt the pull of their connection as his other self gave Len the strength to pull the trigger. He saw all of this happening… but…

He came back to reality shaking, head close to Len’s chest as he’d been pulled closer to the man.

“-eathe, just breathe, keep breathing with me Cisco,” He must have fallen during the vibe, because they were currently on the floor. Len had pulled Cisco into his lap, holding the smaller man close as he tried to bring him back to reality.

Cisco sucked in a breath, grabbing onto Len’s arms and trying to get a handle on the shaking. The memories were there, he knew it, but they were getting sucked down, trapped somewhere in his mind and he couldn’t break out.

“Why can’t I remember?” Cisco asked. Len looked him in the eyes.

“You are remembering. You remembered last year, you remembered dying, you remembered-”

“I’m not remembering anything new though. Nothing from after I disappeared. Nothing useful. We still don’t know who took me. We still don’t know what they wanted. We don’t know how I lost my memories. The only things I’m remembering are things that you already know about.”

Len just held Cisco close, trying to share his warmth and calm through their link. “You’ll remember when you need to. I’m sure. You just have to stay focused on what’s important. Which is getting your health up and working through what you do remember. Just keep focusing on that. The rest will come.”

Cisco closed his eyes, leaning into Len’s touch as he let the exhaustion that accompanied vibing wash over him. But before he drifted off, he reached through the connection to read Len’s thoughts.

_He’s nervous too. He doesn’t want me to remember yet. Why is he scared of me remembering?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cisco's memories will be coming back. Sooner than you might think.....


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mardon and the Trickster attack Barry at Christmas, and Harry is less of a jerk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Panic attack.

Caitlin and Jay had gone to disable the bombs, and Cisco and Harry had stayed at the cortex tracking cameras to find a child that had received the bomb gift.

Cisco had given Jay a drone, instructing him on how to use it. He’d wanted to go with, but Caitlin insisted that she could operate it as well as he could, and if Mardon targeted Cisco after Barry then S.T.A.R. labs was one of the safest places to be. And Harry would be the best one to protect him.

It only took a few minutes to locate a child off one of the cameras and get an address, but he could hear Barry suffering. He could hear everything that Barry was going through, and he tried to breathe. It sounded awful. More than that, he knew he had to have gone through the same thing. Why couldn’t he remember??

As soon as Caitlin had the address he changed the monitor back to the video feed from the street, just in time to see Barry get hit with a bolt of lightning.

It was the spark of electricity that did it. It was that moment, where the lightning had flared through the sky and Mark struck out with his fingers splayed in a vindictive arc, pouring lightning into the Barry that Cisco remembered. He remembered ever scream, every cry, every time he begged Mardon to stop.

It all came back to Cisco, and he ran.

 

Cisco shoved his chair away from the desk and bolted out of the room, running as fast as he could. He didn’t even know where he was going, he just knew that he had to get away from it all. Shaking as he ran, Cisco bolted for anything, anything at all where he wouldn’t be found.

He followed the tunnel, then ducked to his right and hid. It was only once he was inside that he realized where he’d hidden. Behind the podium in the time vault.

_Oh well, too late to go looking for somewhere else._

Cisco winced as he realized what he’d done.

_Somewhere else for what kid?_

Cisco shut down his thoughts utterly, closing his eyes and counting down numbers in his head.

_Kid, why are you shutting me out, what’s going on? Cisco? Are you alright? What’s going on? Answer me kid!_

Cisco’s phone started buzzing, so he turned it off. Then he rethought himself and took off the backing, removing the battery.

_Cisco, if you’re in trouble you have to answer me! Please let me know you’re okay!_

Cisco shook his head, continuing to count. If he sent anything across the connection He’d know. Snart would know what Cisco had been through. He’d see it all. He’d see it all and then Cisco would see it all again and Cisco didn’t want to see it. He didn’t want to think about it. Didn’t want to think about his arm shattering. Didn’t want to think about being electrocuted. Didn’t want to think about the knifes, or the chains, or the wires, or the pliers-

Cisco threw up, shaking as he wretch up onto the floor, his shoulders heaving as he lost the contents of his stomach.

_Cisco, what the hell’s going on? Where are you? You’re not alright, I felt that! You’re in pain, where are you? I have to be able to help!_

Cisco shut down the thoughts, focusing on breathing through the nausea and pain.

He shuddered as he heard the door open, curling in on himself behind the podium, hoping it would hide him.

“Ramon, if you wanted to hide you should have not lost your shoe in the hallway.”

Cisco wanted to be annoyed. Or maybe embarrassed, or just relieved that it was just Harry. But the memories had just come back, and everything was reacting like the first time. Like Harry was Harrison, and was going to kill him.

Cisco slammed his eyes shut, breathing in sharply as anxiety crashed around him. He couldn’t stop the shaking, and his ears began to ring with the sharp influx of oxygen even as his brain tried to say he wasn’t getting any.

Suddenly there was an arm around him and a hand gently covering his eyes.

“Count with me Ramon. Seven…”

Cisco just continued to shake, breathing stuttering, and beginning to fail as dizziness overtook him.

“Ramon, I’m not moving on until you say it with me. Seven,”

“Seven.” Cisco managed to gasp out.

“Two, Five,” Harry continued, and Cisco counted it out with him.

“Two, Five,” He didn’t understand this technique, but he was willing to try it.

“Fifteen, Twenty-three,” Cisco repeated the numbers, his mind starting to calm down as his breathing became easier. “Fourteen, seventy two, five, eight, twenty-nine,”

After a few more minutes of the numbers, Cisco was alright. “How did you do that?”

Harry shrugged. “Jesse used to get anxiety attacks. Really bad ones. We did research and discovered that one of the fastest ways to get the brain to calm down was to count randomly. The brain puts so much effort into trying to find the pattern that it can’t get scared.” Harry just looked at Cisco, having removed his hand from Cisco’s eyes. “I’m going to assume you remembered, and your memory of this other Wells started that panic attack?”

Cisco nodded. “I’d never realized I could be so terrified of him before. It was like…he was the monster I couldn’t escape from. Like he would hunt me down no matter where I ran to.”

 Harry nodded. “I’m guessing that means your memories are all back then?”

Cisco nodded. Then he remembered the connection with Len.

_Kid, while I’m glad you’re not panicking anymore, and by all means keep doing WHATEVER it was that stopped it, please at least have the curtsey of responding to me after one to let me know who I have to kill._

Cisco stood up, swaying and nearly falling backwards. Harry reached out and caught him.

“Woah there, you just had a vicious panic attack. You need to rest. Your system’s going to try to shut down after that much adrenaline. Let it.”

Harry slung Cisco’s arm around his neck, helping him walk to the cot. “I can walk by myself,” Cisco complained, but the complaint was empty as he let himself be led to a cot, and let Harry cover him with a blanket.

It was only when he woke up three hours later, to a very empty room and a lot of yelling upstairs that Cisco realized he was in Harry’s cot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He remembers!!! He remembers everything!!! And Len is VERY concerned. Soon you're gonna get answers too! :)   
> (We're almost done! I've been waiting for so long to post this scene!)


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftershock of Cisco regaining his memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Breakdown, and talk of torture.

Len was in the cortex, arguing with Barry. Caitlin and Jay were back too, but Cisco couldn’t see where Harry had gone.

“So you just left him alone with this alternate Harrison again? You could have let me know, I could have been here to keep an eye on him!”

Len was furious. Rightfully so, as Cisco glanced at the clock and shuddered at the hour.

“Hey, it wasn’t Harry’s fault.” Len turned to look at Cisco, just noticing him.

“What happened tonight? Nobody seems to know anything. Why did you stop responding to me?”

He was just worried, but Cisco frowned. “That’s because there’s not much to know. Once we got the location on the bomb I turned to look at the screen, and saw Mardon throwing lightning. It sent me into a panic attack, and I ran. Harry calmed me down.” Len crossed his arms, not entirely convinced.

“Well!” Spoke up Caitlin, “I guess that means you’re not going to be hunting down Harry then?”

“Like you killed Lewis,” tacked on Barry under his breath.

“I thought we were past this-” Cisco cut Len off.

“Hey. That’s not fair to him, he didn’t kill Lewis. I did.”

Everyone froze. Eventually Len broke the silence. “…You remember?”

Cisco hung his head, then nodded. “Yeah. Yeah I remember everything. The lightning must have triggered total recall, because everything’s back.”

Len let out a breath. “And that’s why you shut me out…”

“Wait wait wait, go back to the part where _you_ killed Lewis?” Like that was the only thing Barry cared about. “It was Len’s gun, and an ice beam right to the chest. Len said he was the one who killed him.”

“He was the one holding the gun, yeah. But I’m the one that pulled the trigger. He was about to kill us. It was the only option we had.”

“Cisco, you can’t take the blame for what I-”

“Len, you said it yourself, you couldn’t kill him. I know we didn’t have a chance to talk it over, but I came to accept that I was the one who killed him. You can’t blame yourself for it.” He turned back to the rest of the team. “When Mardon was put away, before anyone could save me Lewis found me. He used me to try and manipulate Len. Part of that was that he shot me. Len tried to save me as best he could, but it came down to a standoff between him and Lewis. During that we discovered by accident that not only to senses, thoughts, and memories flow, but impulses and physical control do too. When they were at a standoff, I could feel Len start to freeze, and I knew Lewis was about to pull the trigger which would kill both of us. So, I used my connection with Len to pull the trigger for him. If you want to blame someone for Lewis’s death; which you SHOULDN’T because he was a BASTARD and it was self-defense, then blame me.”

Everyone was stunned silent. “Now, if you excuse me, I need to go convince my mind that my body has actually healed from all the injuries it’s just now remembering. If you have any questions I’ll be in the break room.”

 

Cisco had barely been in the break room for a minute before Len came in. “Cisco… I just wanted to say…”

“You don’t have to.” Cisco’s shirt was off, and he was looking down at his arms as if telling his mind that nothing was wrong with them. “I get it. You were looking for me that whole time.”

Len sighed, sitting down on a chair, trying not to look at the scars. “It’s okay, you can look.” He glanced up. Cisco was looking at him intently, smiling softly. “I’m not really self-conscious about them.”

The scars were numerous. Len had known some of them were there, but he hadn’t wanted to pry, especially since Cisco didn’t remember everything. Cisco was different too, even if just in the way he carried himself. He was sure of himself. Less nervous. Not as scared. Ironic, seeing as he had more to be scared of.

“Where were you?”

Of course that was what mattered. Months of missing memories and a missing person and he comes back with scars up and down his body, the first thing he asks is what matters.

Cisco didn’t seem to mind though, putting his shirt back on, (and since when did he have those abs?) and settling on the couch. “Honestly… I still don’t know.”

Len stared. “You never knew?”

“…He never told me. It was far though, far enough away that even if I had access to tech I wouldn’t have been able to use it. There were mountains and rivers surrounding the…fortress? I guess that’s what it was. I large fortress in the middle of nowhere.”

“He? So you know who took you?” Cisco nodded. “…Was it Zoom?”

“Zoom-what? Oh, no. No, it wasn’t Zoom.” He took a deep breath, and Len reached over, covering Cisco’s clenched hands with his own. “It wasn’t Zoom… and I was never supposed to remember.”

“What?”

“He took my memories, and he didn’t want me to ever remember. I think it was the trauma from when Dr. Light escaped that knocked everything back into place, but he tried to make sure I would never remember that he was here.”

“Who?” Cisco began shaking, even though his voice had been steady up to that point. “Cisco, who had you?”

He chuckled, a mirthless sound as he looked up at the roof, swallowing down his nerves. “You know, it’s strange,” he began, voice beginning to crack. “I didn’t realize it at first. I’d only ever gotten a glimpse of him before, and it was so short… so short and so confusing and I thought I’d never see him again…”

Len was on the couch next to Cisco now, rubbing his back. “…But he’s back. He shouldn’t even exist anymore and he’s back.”

“You don’t mean…”

“Thawne. Thawne’s back. From some future where it hasn’t happened to him yet, but it’s still him. He doesn’t look like Harrison yet, hasn’t stolen his face yet. But it’s him. I didn’t recognize him till the first time he ran. The first time I saw the lightning, the first time…” He swallowed, choking back the rising pitch of his voice. “the first time he tried to get me to talk. I was so shocked I couldn’t say anything. After that I began to prepare myself. There was a library, and I would study from it. Anything and everything from martial arts to torture techniques and meditation. Anything I thought I could use to prepare myself. I didn’t break till-”

Len cut him off, wrapping him in a tight hug. “Hey, no, it’s alright. It’s alright, you’re safe here. You don’t need to go through that pain again.” And he could feel the pain, even sharper now that Cisco was right here with him. Cisco was beginning to sob, breaking down in Len’s arms.

“Len… Len I broke after two months. He kept me so I would recover enough that no one would notice.”

Cisco held out his hand, clenching it and unclenching it as if it still hurt. “He broke my hands. Every bone in them. Phased through and broke them all. I only recovered because I’m a meta. He knows everything now.”

Len held Cisco close, holding his hands to his chest to feel the warmth there. “He only knows what you knew then. We’ve got secrets on our side that you didn’t know about. We beat him before, we’ll beat him again. It’s going to be alright. You’ve recovered. You’re free. And now we’re going to send him somewhere he’ll never hurt anyone ever again.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay! We're almost there! I just have to keep writing, and hopefully I'll have this finished before the new year? (fingers crossed!)


End file.
